She’s mostly covered by him, but even so, I recognize Daphne Smith right away because, with her five-foot-eight height and long golden locks, she’s a total Greek goddess of a human being who looks like she could be on Bachelor in Paradise. James has her pushed up against the far side wall, in a corner that’s out of the overhead security camera’s field of view, a fact I know because James and I have made out before in that very spot.

My stomach drops, and I freeze from the sheer shock of it all. The three of us are alone in the small space, and James and Daphne would have totally noticed me walking in if they hadn’t been so disgustingly all over each other. Thankfully, they both still have their clothes on, but from the noises they’re making, they may as well be naked. Sultry moans escape from Daphne’s mouth, while James sounds like a cross between a caveman and a porn star.

I try to remember if he always sounded like that. If he did, I must have gotten used to it in my seven years of dating him. Suddenly, I feel very, very sorry for Past Gemma. And not only because she just walked in on her ex.

Belatedly, I turn around, deciding to get the papers I printed later. But before I can leave the room, the door opens, revealing Shane, one of my other coworkers.

Fuck.

Three things happen, in quick succession.

“Oh hey, Gemma,” Shane says. “Is the printer jammed—”

James yells, “Shit!”

“Oh God!” Shane cries out, covering his eyes.

James and Daphne jump apart, and I mentally scream.

“What the fuck, Gemma?” exclaims James. “Have you been watching us this entire time?”

I raise my eyebrows. So now he decides to acknowledge my existence. Trying my best to avoid his gaze, I peer back at Daphne, instead. Her face is flushed, and she’s glaring at me with utter contempt in her eyes. I can’t say I blame her. In this one horrible moment, my coworker, my ex, and my ex’s new… something all stare at me, eyes wide with confusion and disbelief.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” I say, trying to ignore the heat burning up my cheeks. “I was just trying to get some printouts. Speaking of which, excuse me!”

Zeroing in on the printer like a horse with blinders, I rush in, grab the still-warm papers from the tray, and dash out before anyone else can say anything. On the off chance that James will chase me down, I speed into the elevator and repeatedly hit close.