She shrugs. “Well, unlike Aaron and Brent, he’s bi, not gay. So I guess there’s always that possibility. But no, apparently I’m too scary to be his type. He claims he can barely tolerate me as a friend.”

This time, I can’t stop myself from full-on hollering. “Too scary!”

Celeste shrugs again, but she’s smiling now, too.

It’s raining outside, so after Celeste and I wish each other a happy holiday, I stay inside the lobby to request a car to my friends’ place. I do have my umbrella, so theoretically, I could walk to the bus, ride it to the light rail stop, and take the train to Inner Sunset. But I don’t want to deal with the cold rain, and especially not at night.

As I wait for my ride, I realize this was the first time in a while that Celeste and I had an extensive, personal conversation together. It was nice, but also strangely foreign, like putting on a favorite cardigan that had been lost under the bed for several years.

My car arrives, and as I get in, I wonder if Celeste and I could possibly be friends again, chatting for hours like we did before we even officially dated. Celeste talking about her friend Min-joon made me slightly jealous, not because of anything romantic, but because I wished I also had that kind of friendship with someone. I love Kiara and Val, but it’d be nice to have a friend who’s queer and shares the same cultural background as me.

I stare down at my phone, wondering if I should ask Celeste to just be friends. But then, I get a flash of us on Sunday, of how I was seconds away from ripping off her clothes. With a sigh, I rest my head on the window and close my eyes, listening to the pitter-patter of the rain.

19: Gemma

The next day at work, Evelyn sticks her head out of her office door as I walk by.

“Gemma?” she says. “A word, please.”

I sent her the materials for Brent and Aaron’s interview last night, so when I enter the room, I ask, “Was there an issue with the third interview?”

Evelyn blinks. “What? No, it was fantastic. You did a fabulous job getting the couple to open up. There’s something else related to the project that I wanted to talk to you about.”

I brace myself, wondering what it could be, but even then, I’m wholly unprepared when Evelyn says, “You and Celeste should come to the New Year’s Eve party.”

At first, I think I misheard her. My boss, telling me to come to an office party… with my ex? Did I somehow hit my head and fall into one of my worst nightmares?