Thankfully, when I’m back at my desk, everyone’s working again. I can’t see James’s face from where his desk is on the opposite side of the room, but I see him hunched over his computer. Daphne and Shane are also at their respective desks, typing away as if absolutely nothing happened twenty minutes ago. What a bizarre day.

I send the documents I need to the printer again, and, while waiting for everything to print, I download a few dating apps. But once they’ve finished loading, I can’t bring myself to open a single one.

Dating apps are daunting, especially since I know most people my age have already been on and off them. Meanwhile, I haven’t used any before now, to the extent that whenever someone writes into Dear Karl asking for advice on dating apps, I automatically forward the question to another writer who’s used them before. I wasn’t old enough to use them when they first became popular, and in college, I met people in person, like Celeste and James.

Given my track record, maybe I’m better off letting an app help me meet someone.

I end up leaving the office later than I intended to, mainly because I throw myself deep into work to avoid thinking about my own shit show of a romantic life. I’m still reading long email chains I’m cc’d on as I ride the train back to my friends’ apartment.

Things seem to be progressing slower than expected, as they often do in this industry due to the usual concoction of staff shortages, declining funds, and bureaucracy, so I have no idea who the mysterious photographer Kiara mentioned is yet. I’m not even remotely delusional enough to hope that the photographer they pair me up with will like other women, like Val had jokingly hoped. But it’ll be nice to meet and spend time with someone new, even just platonically. I love Val and Kiara, but after two weeks of living with them, I’m tired of third wheeling. Hopefully the photographer and I can at the very least bond over memories of our alma mater.

Even if she does happen to be queer, I’m not sure if I’ll even have the bandwidth to start anything because the stakes, as they often are these days, are high. According to Evelyn’s emails, if we don’t generate enough clicks or print sales in the next quarter, there’s a good possibility that our parent company will rebrand the magazine altogether to focus on more profitable sectors like tech or real estate. Evelyn hasn’t explicitly said what’ll happen to us local lifestyle writers if and when this kind of rebranding happens, but I can guess the outcome. And because I don’t know anything about computers or houses, I’ll be out of a job.