Pete’s voice is quavering and he walks slowly forward with his hands out gently, like he’s lost his sight and is finding his way, like he doesn’t want to trip and fall.

“Let’s think about this, okay?” he says. “Let’s not do something that we’ll regret. It’s not too late to change our minds, okay? I’m here for you.”

“I don’t believe you,” I say. “You weren’t there. You left, Pete!” I cry out, my voice hysterical in my ears. “So stay, now, Pete. On your knees.” There are tears, or maybe it’s blood running down my face.

He falls where he is, his hands still out, trying to placate me.

Aidan’s large frame is crouching near the front of the room between two desks, close to Paige, who is shaking with sobs. He looks up at me and shuts his eyes tightly, shaking his head in fear. He gags, then, and vomit trickles from his mouth. There is rattling at the doorknob; someone is yelling and trying to get in. I hear sirens in the distance.

“You act like you care about things, but you can’t see what’s right in front of you. You never get to know anyone.” I look up at the hole above me, lift the lighter again. I close my eyes and whisper, “Who knows Dee? Who knows me?”

The gun feels light, but I suddenly feel tired, weak. It is exhausting, this loneliness. This solitude. It is a burden. I don’t want this, Dee. Please. Just let it go. Let me go.

There is someone at the door, screaming, “Get off me; that’s my dad’s class! Pete! Pete!”

It’s Lottie. I pause, turning my head to the sound of her voice.

Something reaches me as if from a distance. I can’t … It’s a fog, a ringing in my ears. But. All the pain. All the hurt.

Stevie.

I just want a release. Relief. I don’t want to hurt anyone.

You’ve gone this far. Come ON.

No. I want to stop, Dee.

The lighter is flicked. The wick is lit.

I take charge. I push her away.

I am Stevie, I say.

Pete lunges. There is screaming. There is an explosion. There is nothing.

*   *   *

PAIGE: I knew there was something that wasn’t right about her. She thought she was better than everyone. I tried to include her and make friends with her, but she [indecipherable] away.

MATTHEW: She had been acting different over the last few months. I’ve known Stevie for a long time, but I think all the bullying really got to her. I just wish she’d talked to someone about it.

MARTA: No, I never could have predicted this. That’s all I can say, sorry.

ANTAR: Please. Just leave us alone. This is too upsetting. Just [indecipherable] please.

LOTTIE: No comment. Get out of my way.