Back Love and Other Lies
Chapters (61)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Imagine a girl
  4. Prologue
  5. The Foreigner
  6. One
  7. Two
  8. Three
  9. Four
  10. Five
  11. The Skeptic
  12. Six
  13. Seven
  14. Eight
  15. Nine
  16. Ten
  17. Eleven
  18. Twelve
  19. Thirteen
  20. Fourteen
  21. Fifteen
  22. Sixteen
  23. Seventeen
  24. Eighteen
  25. Nineteen
  26. Twenty
  27. Twenty-One
  28. Twenty-Two
  29. Twenty-Three
  30. The Spectator
  31. Twenty-Four
  32. Twenty-Five
  33. Twenty-Six
  34. Twenty-Seven
  35. Twenty-Eight
  36. Twenty-Nine
  37. The Assassin
  38. Thirty
  39. Thirty-One
  40. Thirty-Two
  41. Thirty-Three
  42. Thirty-Four
  43. Thirty-Five
  44. Thirty-Six
  45. Thirty-Seven
  46. Thirty-Eight
  47. Thirty-Nine
  48. Forty
  49. Forty-One
  50. The Hunter
  51. Forty-Two
  52. Forty-Three
  53. Forty-Four
  54. Forty-Five
  55. Forty-Six
  56. Forty-Seven
  57. Imagine a girl
  58. Acknowledgments
  59. About the Author
  60. Also by Ben McPherson
  61. About the Publisher

She looked at me as if I were insane. “Cal,” she said, “you cannot allow Pavel Lisowki’s state of mind to become your state of mind.”

“That’s not what I’m saying.”

“Licia is back. I will not let you just stand and watch happiness slip from your grasp.”

“All right,” I said.

“You have a duty now to be happy,” she said. “A duty. To your daughters, to your son, and to your wife.”

She locked her eyes on to mine, smiled the most beautiful smile, and her wolf eyes glowed blue-white and gold. I felt in my heart that she was right.

We tipped Licia’s possessions into a black plastic sack, which we placed in the hallway. Vee wrangled the mattress from the bed and stood on the narrow deck at the front of the apartment, beating out the dust for all she was worth. Elsa and I filled buckets with Pine-Sol and hot water and washed down the walls. When Vee had finished with the mattress she fetched a bucket, began to wash down the frame of her sister’s bed.

We worked wordlessly, methodically, smiling all the while. And all the while Licia slept. Or so we thought. I was scrubbing at a mark on the skirting when I felt eyes on me. I stopped, looked up.

There she was, framed in the doorway.

“Hey,” I said.

Licia frowned.

Elsa got to her feet, walked to the door.

Vee was smiling up at her sister. “We’re cleaning up.”

Again Licia frowned.

Vee’s smile froze. I tried to catch her eye, to let her know that things were okay, but she swallowed hard and looked away.

Licia turned toward her mother, who was trying to embrace her.

“Please don’t feel you have to, Mum.”

Elsa laughed an uncertain laugh. “Have to what? Hug you, or tidy up your room?”

Licia gave Elsa a stiff little hug. “I tidy my own room, Mum. Please.”

“You know what’s weird?” said Vee pleasantly.

“What’s weird?”

“We’re all so happy to see you home. Like, really unbelievably happy. And you aren’t. You aren’t at all happy to see us.”

“Vee,” I said.

Licia was frowning at her sister.

“Well, she isn’t, Dad.” She turned toward Licia. “Are you?”

“Of course.”

“Licia,” said Elsa, “I don’t think there’s anything in your wardrobe that will fit you any longer.”

“Are you really happy to see us?” said Vee.

Elsa put an arm on Licia’s shoulder and began to turn her. “What say you come with me and pick out a couple of dresses from my wardrobe?”

Licia nodded. They walked from the room.

I looked at Vee. Vee looked at me. “What?” she said.

“It’s early days, and your sister has experienced something unbelievably traumatic, Vee.”

“Like, people dying? Or weird kidnap sex stuff?”