texted with chelsea and made dinner plans for monday, and then have ‘a day’ saturday where we walk around PS1 and get drunk and i sleep over on her ‘new twin sleeper sofa.’

texted with [omitted] who was making salmon and arranged to hang out at his place.

texted crissy that i loved and missed her.

12[something]-11:09pm: did not update.

11:10pm: driving to [omitted]. Three teenage boys running on the street. I put my key in the wrong car. Felt sinking thing thinking ‘this is my street now, apartment in Baltimore remember that, Chelsea, soon you’ll see Chelsea, this is your street, how is it this now’

Listening to Jeffrey Lewis

Have eaten maybe 60mg concerta to ‘feel normal’

memorable things post-11:10PM:

circled around a cop and a popeye’s more times than normal, looking for parking

texted with zachery w., made plans to do bing.com ‘get $10 for photographing restaurants’ safari thing friday

crissy texted back that if ever needed a ‘break from the rat race’ she was only a 16 hour car drive away. read that as i walked to the wrong address. imagined driving down to florida to hang out…bring my cats maybe…16 hours in the car. i miss crissy. would be fun to visit. in 40 years we’ll probably be the only people left of our immediate family. i’ll be 57 and she’ll be 77

called [omitted] to say i was outside but that he didn’t live where i was. my phone was doing the thing where i could hear the other person but they can’t hear me

texted [omitted] same information

[omitted] texted me correct street address and i checked and it’s what he texted in the first place too. sometimes some numbers look the same to me…or else i’m just not paying enough attention. numbers easily confused for me: two, eight, nine, six, four, five (especially eight and six, also i’m the worst at my eight’s and six’s tables) (also for the hell of it, letters easily confused for me [mostly confused about where they appear in alphabet, while working at a bookstore in baltimore. i’d be shelving books by authors with names starting with these letters and i’d have to mentally say the alphabet: b, d, p, q, r, s, t, j, k, u, v, w])

parked near [omitted] and walked to address, looking around a lot

stood outside door to [omitted]’s building and texted i was here

heard someone say my name from maybe across the street and looked vaguely out into nothing and said ‘yeah’

person said my name again and i looked up and it was [omitted] smiling smoking cigarette from fire escape window. he was wearing a hat. his face looks different every time i see him

i felt ‘bouncy heart’ and was laughing i think, surprised, said ‘throw the ladder down to me, i’ll climb up’ or something

he said ‘i’ll buzz you in’