Luke watched me intently. Not in a sexual way, but in a way that let me know that he was seeing everything he’d missed out on. Little moments, things that lucky people took for granted that really meant everything. Sorrow suffused his expression. “Will this always be between us?” he asked as he stood in the doorway, half in and half out of the room.

Why did I feel like he wanted to get away?

“I don’t think so. It’s all new, and we’re moving too fast. But there will always be new memories to make, Luke.” I was struck by how similar this was to what I’d told Dylan the other day. I wished I believed it. Maybe I could if this cloud of sorrow would go away.

As if he could sense my doubts, he said, “Lily, I’m going home. Sweet dreams. I’ll let myself out.”

Luke

I rushed down the stairs and out of the front door, locking it behind me. I had to get out of there before Lily saw me break down. I had no right to be this upset. I chose this. I’d missed her pregnancy, Dylan’s birth. I’d never seen Dylan as a baby. I’d been there for none of it due to my stupid choices. As I turned from the door, I saw Ben, Lily’s dad, leaning against the side of his truck.

“I thought I’d wait for you and make sure you’re okay.” He studied my face. “I knew it would hit you.”

I blinked a few times, not wanting to cry in front of him. I didn’t want to cry at all, but grief for the past I’d lost burned a hole in my heart. I pressed my palms into my eyes and nodded. I got a handle on it and met his eyes. “How do I fix this, Ben?”

“Do what you’ve been doing—be there for them and don’t leave. There will be times like this that burn. There is no way to go back in this life, you can only go forward. And maybe next time, you talk to Lily about this instead of me.” He gave me a look. “Not that it’s wrong to talk to me, but you two need to communicate. Honesty—it’s the key—I always say it. Occasionally, it sinks in.” He grinned and slapped me on the shoulder before pulling me in for a quick hug. “I’m glad you’re back, Luke. I’ve told you that and I meant it. Go home and get some rest. Back at it tomorrow, okay?”

I nodded, and he got into his truck and took off.