“If you think I want to marry you after all I know now, you’ve lost your goddamned mind.”

“I mean, I’d want a paternity test.”

“Would you? And what then? What would the proof of a paternity test change for you?” I shake my head. “I might not like how this happened, but I’m not upset to know I’m going to be a mother.”

“Well, at least that’s one of us.” He blows out a breath. “You got just what you wanted, didn’t you? An excuse to stay home. An excuse to ignore everything you’ve worked so hard for so you can . . . what? How will you support this kid? Are you going to be a fucking bartender?”

I know that shot is supposed to hurt, but it doesn’t. I don’t care what he thinks of me, of my family or my choices. “I’m only telling you because it’s the right thing to do. Not because I expect anything from you.”

He looks dumbstruck. I wonder how many other women he’s been sleeping with while not using condoms and pretending to be single. Maybe even other women at this college who thought they were protecting their own reputation by keeping the secret. “I think it would be easier all around if you make this decision regarding the baby in the same way I told you to make the decisions regarding your career,” he says. “Don’t factor me into the equation.”

“Would you sign away your rights to the child?”

He shrugs, as if I’m asking for something meaningless. “If that’s what you want, that’s fine with me.”

I take a breath. “And when I defend my dissertation, I expect you to do the same. Evaluate me as if we were never together, as if we were never involved.”

“You think I’m going to evaluate you unfairly because of all of this? I have the highest regard for academic integrity.”

I laugh. “Because academic integrity is everything, right? Apparently, for you, it’s even more important than personal integrity.” I take the ultrasound photo from his desk, tuck it into my purse, and leave his office.

Maybe it’s not wise to walk away with bitterness between us when the future of my degree hangs in the balance. If I’m going to move away and start over, I’m going to want this degree I’ve busted my ass for. But it was worth it.

Easton

Me: Everything okay? I missed you yesterday.

Shay: I’m dealing with some stuff at school. I’ve had some unexpected changes that complicate things.

Me: Can I help?

Shay: I need to do this myself.

Me: Will I see you at gymnastics tonight? Abi is excited.

Shay: No, Nic’s taking Lilly.

Me: You’re avoiding me.