When I turn back to them, she’s pushed Carter out of her room and is closing the door after him.

Never been kissed. I can hardly wrap my brain around it.

Shay

I can’t focus on my book, but I can’t sleep either. Who could with the party roaring downstairs?

I roll over and bury my face in a pillow, muffling my frustrated scream. I can’t believe I told Easton I’ve never been kissed. I could’ve lied. He never would’ve known. But the worst part is that I also admitted to having a crush on one of my brothers’ friends. I won’t make the same mistake if he asks about that again. Sometimes we have to lie to protect ourselves, and I know better than to leave my heart unguarded against Easton Connor.

I clutch a second pillow to my chest, my skin all tingly with memories of him in my room—standing so close and passing the beer to me while we traded secrets. His body so close as he touched his forehead to mine and asked if I wanted him to kiss me.

Could it hurt to close my eyes and let myself imagine what it would’ve been like? I’m totally unworthy, and he’s a fucking football star—now a first-round NFL draft pick—but it would hardly be the first time I’ve indulged such a fantasy. In an alternate reality, I could have accepted that kiss. I imagine myself as the tall, thin beauty my mom was at my age, and I imagine him as just Easton—the boy who patched up my knee when I fell off my bike and who told me jokes when I was sad. In that alternate reality, it wouldn’t have been a pity kiss at all but something he wanted as much as I did.

He wouldn’t have asked with words. He would’ve asked with the slow descent of his mouth to mine, and I wouldn’t have pulled away. He would’ve tasted like beer and been gentle, and I would’ve been a naturally good kisser. So good, he would’ve groaned into my mouth like the heroes in romance novels do.

I flip over in bed again, whimpering in frustration.

My bedroom door clicks, and I stare at it in the darkness. Is Carter checking on me? I don’t know why he’s suddenly so worried about me and Easton being alone together. Probably because I got boobs. Finally.

“Shay? You awake?” The husky whisper is a tripwire in my stomach, causing all my internal organs to detonate before clumsily righting themselves.

I roll to my side, watching the door as I hold the pillow to my chest. “Yeah. Everything okay?”

The sliver of hallway light grows as East steps into the room. “Could I sit in here with you?”