Back Expectation: a Novel
Chapters (66)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Epigraph
  4. London Fields
  5. 2010
  6. Hannah
  7. Cate
  8. Lissa
  9. Cate
  10. Abjections
  11. Hannah
  12. Lissa
  13. Soulmates
  14. Cate
  15. Lissa
  16. Hannah
  17. Resistance
  18. Cate
  19. Lissa
  20. Hannah
  21. True North
  22. Cate
  23. Lissa
  24. Hannah
  25. London
  26. Lissa
  27. Cate
  28. Lissa
  29. Hannah
  30. Bras
  31. Cate
  32. Hannah
  33. Cate
  34. Hannah
  35. Cate
  36. Hannah
  37. Lissa
  38. Hannah
  39. Lissa
  40. Hens
  41. Cate
  42. Hannah
  43. Lissa
  44. Hannah
  45. Cate
  46. Lissa
  47. Hannah
  48. Epithalamium
  49. Lissa
  50. Hannah
  51. Cate
  52. Lissa
  53. Hannah
  54. Lissa
  55. Hannah
  56. Cate
  57. Lissa
  58. Hannah
  59. Lissa
  60. 2012
  61. Hannah
  62. London Fields
  63. Acknowledgments
  64. About the Author
  65. Also by Anna Hope
  66. About the Publisher

Cate herself is certain of nothing. Life seems at once becalmed and full of danger, as though a wave could come at any moment, rising out of the still waters, a great towering wave, and take her down.

She receives her finals results. She has scraped a first-class degree. She tells Hannah, who looks shocked. “It was an accident,” says Cate hurriedly. And then hates herself for saying it. Still, she thinks, it was an accident. She never expected that.

Her tutor calls to congratulate her. “So what are you going to do?” he says.

She can only think that she would like to tell her mum. To give her the good news.

SHE GETS AN email from Hesther, a friend from Oxford who is living in Brighton, inviting her down for the day. There is a room available in her house.

As she steps off the London train, Cate can smell the sea. She walks down to the seafront and stands on the pebbled beach and stares out at the pale horizon. She walks through the city to Hesther’s house. Brighton seems appealingly ramshackle, human-sized. The room is cheap and small with a window that lets in good light. She takes it. She buys herself some furniture from the charity shops on Lewes Road.

The other room is occupied by a woman called Lucy. Lucy wears combat pants and vests and boots with thick soles, as though she is a foot soldier in an unnamed war. She has thick dreadlocks that hang down her back, and her face is small and fine. She is studying for a master’s in international development at the University of Sussex. She is half American—grew up between Devon and Massachusetts, and her accent is deliciously confused. Two summers ago Lucy lived up a tree in Newbury, sleeping on a wooden platform a hundred feet above the earth, protesting the destruction of ancient woodland for the building of a highway.

Lucy teaches Cate how to use a drill, how to put up shelves in her room. She has a light cloud of armpit hair and does not use deodorant. When they stand close, Cate catches her musky scent. Walking around the city with Lucy is an education—she has a scavenger’s eye: wood for the wood burner, wine crates for shelves, just-out-of-date food from supermarket clearance bins. Lucy carries herself lightly, as though she still walks in the forest. As though at any moment she might be predator or prey.