Back Expectation: a Novel Save as PDF
Chapters (66)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Epigraph
  4. London Fields
  5. 2010
  6. Hannah
  7. Cate
  8. Lissa
  9. Cate
  10. Abjections
  11. Hannah
  12. Lissa
  13. Soulmates
  14. Cate
  15. Lissa
  16. Hannah
  17. Resistance
  18. Cate
  19. Lissa
  20. Hannah
  21. True North
  22. Cate
  23. Lissa
  24. Hannah
  25. London
  26. Lissa
  27. Cate
  28. Lissa
  29. Hannah
  30. Bras
  31. Cate
  32. Hannah
  33. Cate
  34. Hannah
  35. Cate
  36. Hannah
  37. Lissa
  38. Hannah
  39. Lissa
  40. Hens
  41. Cate
  42. Hannah
  43. Lissa
  44. Hannah
  45. Cate
  46. Lissa
  47. Hannah
  48. Epithalamium
  49. Lissa
  50. Hannah
  51. Cate
  52. Lissa
  53. Hannah
  54. Lissa
  55. Hannah
  56. Cate
  57. Lissa
  58. Hannah
  59. Lissa
  60. 2012
  61. Hannah
  62. London Fields
  63. Acknowledgments
  64. About the Author
  65. Also by Anna Hope
  66. About the Publisher

“None of my business,” he says quietly. “I know.”

Then he lifts her hand in that same courtly gesture, his lips to her knuckles, and turns away. She watches as he slings his black leather bag over his shoulder and slips out of the door without any elaborate good-byes.

On the other side of the room, Michael and Helen are kissing, their hands in each other’s hair. Lissa checks her phone again. The sand is running out—soon the magic will dissipate and the play will truly be over. Soon the night will end and there will be nothing but the flat and the call center, and she will no longer be a queen.

Mermaid’s blood.

She lets herself out of the dressing room, walks down the darkened hallway. After a few steps she stops and calls Nathan. He picks up on the second ring. “Liss?” Wherever he is, it sounds quiet.

“I want you,” she says. “Can you come here? Now?”

There is a pause and then: “Where are you?”

“At the theater.”

“How long will you be there for?”

“An hour. Maybe more.”

“I’ll come.”

She clicks off the phone, holds it lightly in her palm. Hears her breath in the hallway. It is as though she has taken half a step outside her skin, to a place where things are weightless, where there is only the logic of desire. She feels no guilt, only interest. She wonders if it would be this easy to murder.

At half past eleven, her phone buzzes in her pocket and she slips out of the room without being seen, making her way through the bar, where the bar staff are cleaning up, to where Nathan is standing waiting outside on the street, hunched into his winter coat, smoking a cigarette, smoke pluming in the cold air. It has started to snow, and flakes tumble from the sky. Already an inch or two has gathered on the pavement.

She steps towards him, reaching and taking his cigarette from him, bringing it to her mouth. The smoke hits her bloodstream, mingling with the alcohol, meeting the cold, making her reel.

“You’re her still,” he says.

She looks down at herself—her velvet coat, her boots. She had forgotten she was wearing her costume. “Yes,” she says, and she can see how this pleases him—how it excites him. “Yes, I’m still her.”

He takes her wrist and pulls her to him. His mouth tastes of smoke. She can feel him against her, already hard. “Where can we go?” he says.

“Here,” she says. “You can come in here.”