“Give me the list,” Jordan said.

“Again, let’s give your body more time to heal. And I don’t want to give you false hope. Many of these therapies are experimental.”

“What do I do in the meantime? What if I’m released from the hospital, and I can’t see?”

“If that’s the case, then I’ll have an occupational therapist visit you.”

“Why?”

“She can talk to you about training for people with vision loss,” Dr. Kensington said.

“You mean like braille or a cane?”

“Yes.”

“Those don’t sound like solutions. They’re adaptation strategies,” she said. “I’m not going to adjust to this.”

“You may not have a choice,” Dr. Kensington said.

Life had taken away her ability to choose before when her family had moved from Boston, when her mother had died, and when her sister had gotten high. She had adjusted to it all, but each new forced path had been difficult. And she always mourned the life she’d had before the changes. But the idea that she would never see again was crushing. How could she keep her life and Avery’s together if she could not see?

“Are there any questions?” Dr. Kensington asked.

Pressing him for details was like trying to squeeze blood from a stone. “No,” she said bluntly.

“You sure?” he asked.

“Unless you have more information to share?”

“No.”

“Then we’ve done all we can today.”

“Call me if you need me,” Dr. Kensington said.

“Will do.” When he left, she gently ran her fingers over her flushed face, noting the knot on the right side of her forehead. She must have hit the floor hard after she had been struck. “You’re still there, aren’t you, Spencer?”

“Yes.”

Having him here was keeping her from breaking down completely. “How does my face look? And if you say ‘not bad,’ I’ll scream.”

“Like you went five rounds with a boxer.”

“You should see the other guy.” The joke fell flat and sounded sad. “Bruises I can deal with. But nerve damage.” She closed her eyes for a moment. “This scares the shit out of me, Spencer.”

He eased closer to the bed. “One step at a time, Detective.”

She wanted him to take her hand, tell her it was all going to be fine. Instead, she counted to three, hoping when she opened her eyes, she would see Spencer’s frowning mug and realize all this had been a mistake. She raised her lids and stared into shadows.

“Any luck?” he asked.

Feeling Spencer’s scrutiny, she raised her chin. “No.”

The darkness shrank in around her, pushing all her fears and insecurities to the surface. She wanted to crumble. She wanted to give up.

“Detective Poe, are you all right?” Spencer asked.