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Contents (112)
  1. Dedication
  2. Epigraph
  3. Contents
  4. Chapter One
  5. The Cat’s Out of the Box
  6. Chapter Two
  7. The Most Important Meal of the Day
  8. Chapter Three
  9. The Comeback Kid Minus the Comebacks
  10. Chapter Four
  11. AKA Patricia
  12. Chapter Five
  13. One Size Does Not Fit All
  14. Chapter Six
  15. The Difference Between Like and Like-Like
  16. Chapter Seven
  17. Good as Gravy
  18. Chapter Eight
  19. By Invitation Only
  20. Chapter Nine
  21. The Witching Hour
  22. Chapter Ten
  23. 100% Duck
  24. Chapter Eleven
  25. It’s the Thought That Counts
  26. Chapter Twelve
  27. Our Very Best Life
  28. Chapter Thirteen
  29. The Life of the Party
  30. Chapter Fourteen
  31. Ask and You Shall Receive
  32. Chapter Fifteen
  33. R-E-S-P-E-C-T
  34. Chapter Sixteen
  35. Neutral Territory
  36. Chapter Seventeen
  37. A Girl on a Mission
  38. Chapter Eighteen
  39. Paper, Paper, Get Your Paper!
  40. Chapter Nineteen
  41. Risky Business
  42. Chapter Twenty
  43. No Right Choice
  44. Chapter Twenty-One
  45. The Kind of Promise You Can Keep
  46. Chapter Twenty-Two
  47. Behind Door Number Three
  48. Chapter Twenty-Three
  49. Common Ground
  50. Chapter Twenty-Four
  51. Back on the Market
  52. Chapter Twenty-Five
  53. Let It All Out
  54. Chapter Twenty-Six
  55. My Calling
  56. Chapter Twenty-Seven
  57. First-Date Jitters
  58. Chapter Twenty-Eight
  59. Home Sweet Home
  60. Chapter Twenty-Nine
  61. Causing a Scene
  62. Chapter Thirty
  63. A New Kind of Normal
  64. Chapter Thirty-One
  65. Stuck in the Middle
  66. Chapter Thirty-Two
  67. Three Legs Are Better Than Two
  68. Chapter Thirty-Three
  69. Project BFF
  70. Chapter Thirty-Four
  71. Lip-Synching for My Life
  72. Chapter Thirty-Five
  73. Dear Sweet Pea
  74. Author’s Note
  75. About the Author
  76. Copyright
  77. About the Publisher

She giggles before turning back around. “I have so much to teach you.”

She’s right. There’s so much I don’t know. But right now what I really don’t know is who the heck I’m going to pick for my project.

I end up spending time at Miss Flora Mae’s house on Monday and then again on Tuesday. I snuck another response from me into this week’s package for Mr. Joe Salazar. So if I’m doing my math right, my next published letter should be in this Thursday’s paper.

On Wednesday, there’s another fresh batch of letters waiting for me in the mailbox, and I run inside, water the plants, turn on the radio, wave to Bette Davis the cat, and tear into the latest letters.

With a fizzing glass of ginger ale in hand, I find that the letters have a way of blending together. It’s not that they’re boring, but it’s just a surprise to see how much everyone has in common and how alike all our problems really are.

Some of the letters are pretty funny. One guy is about to move in with his girlfriend and is scared of farting in his sleep. I decide to write him back, taking a page out of Mom’s book when I remind him that sometimes bodies are just bodies. I assure him that farting is totally normal.

Another woman writes in asking for tips on how to get her cat to learn how to use and flush the toilet. One lady wants to know if it’s polite to try to bargain with the guy behind the deli counter, and one guy even sent in a picture of a mole shaped like Mickey Mouse, wondering if it was too cool to get rid of or if he should let his dermatologist remove it. I leave all of those for Miss Flora Mae.

My favorite, though, is one I can’t resist answering.

Dear Miss Flora Mae,

I start kindergarten next year, and I’m so nervous that I haven’t been able to sleep. My mom said maybe you would have advice. In fact, she’s the one writing you for me. I hope that’s okay.

Sincerely,

Little Miss Nervous

P.S. Hi, Miss Flora Mae! —Little Miss Nervous’s Equally Nervous Mom

This is the first letter that I’ve read that I not only relate to, but I’ve been there. Maybe I’ve found my calling in giving advice. Mom always said I had a bossy streak.

Dear Little Miss Nervous,

I’ve been there. We all have. Starting a new thing is always scary. No more naps and snacks whenever you feel like it and no parents there to make you feel safe. The first thing you should know is that everyone else is just as nervous as you are. The second thing you should know is that you have way more reason to be excited than nervous. There’s no guarantee that every day of the school year will be awesome, but most things aren’t all good or all bad. Enjoy the good days and learn from the tough ones. But most importantly of all: don’t trade lunch with anyone who eats peanut butter on their ham sandwich. I made that mistake once, and it only took one time to learn my lesson.