Caroline took a deep breath and her gaze fell to her lap once more. ‘It would affect our lovemaking too. It often felt like he was seeking reassurance, wanting to know that someone still loved him. But he was never gentle when he was in one of those moods, not like he used to be. And I didn’t dare say no, even though I knew it was going to be painful. Because if I did, he would accuse me of not caring, or even of having an affair.

‘This particular night, he was home late. Thankfully the kids were stopping over at my mother’s. It was obvious he’d been drinking and he started on me straight away. I tried to pacify him but he was having none of it. We were in the kitchen, arguing. I was fed up of trying to massage his ego and I started to retaliate. But he didn’t take kindly to hearing a few home truths.’

She paused and took another deep breath, and Adele could see that her hands were shaking. Adele was about to say that she didn’t need to hear any more when Caroline carried on, ‘He was really hammering his fists into me. I didn’t think he’d ever stop. And I was scared. But I was angry too.

‘Eventually he did stop. I was on the kitchen floor. He’d just raped me… taken me there on the floor! I was bleeding from my nose and I was bashed and bruised. “That’ll teach you,” he said, walking away and, I don’t know why, but for some reason I just flipped.

‘He had his back to me as he walked away. I hated him for what he’d done. I was furious! I got up, rushed to the kitchen drawer and grabbed the first knife I could lay my hands on. I ran at him with it and stabbed him in the back of the neck. The blood was gushing and he yelled. Then I stabbed him again, and again. Until he was still. He fell to the floor and I kicked at him. Then I dropped to my knees, yelling at him. Calling him all the horrid names I could think of for what he’d put me through.

‘I was still in a rage. As I stared at his evil face, memories of all the times he’d abused me flashed through my mind. I started to stab away at his clothes and his flesh. The blood seeped through. I cut a big hole in his trousers with the knife. I could see his penis poking through. I hated it! So I tore at his clothes until he was half naked.

‘Then I cut it off,’ Caroline said quickly. ‘His testicles, too.’