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Chapters (66)
  1. Cover
  2. Title Page
  3. Dedication
  4. Chapter One
  5. Chapter Two
  6. Chapter Three
  7. Chapter Four
  8. Chapter Five
  9. Chapter Six
  10. Chapter Seven
  11. Chapter Eight
  12. Chapter Nine
  13. Chapter Ten
  14. Chapter Eleven
  15. Chapter Twelve
  16. Chapter Thirteen
  17. Chapter Fourteen
  18. Chapter Fifteen
  19. Chapter Sixteen
  20. Chapter Seventeen
  21. Chapter Eighteen
  22. Chapter Nineteen
  23. Chapter Twenty
  24. Chapter Twenty-One
  25. Chapter Twenty-Two
  26. Chapter Twenty-Three
  27. Chapter Twenty-Four
  28. Chapter Twenty-Five
  29. Chapter Twenty-Six
  30. Chapter Twenty-Seven
  31. Chapter Twenty-Eight
  32. Chapter Twenty-Nine
  33. Chapter Thirty
  34. Chapter Thirty-One
  35. Chapter Thirty-Two
  36. Chapter Thirty-Three
  37. Chapter Thirty-Four
  38. Chapter Thirty-Five
  39. Chapter Thirty-Six
  40. Chapter Thirty-Seven
  41. Chapter Thirty-Eight
  42. Chapter Thirty-Nine
  43. Chapter Forty
  44. Chapter Forty-One
  45. Chapter Forty-Two
  46. Chapter Forty-Three
  47. Chapter Forty-Four
  48. Chapter Forty-Five
  49. Chapter Forty-Six
  50. Chapter Forty-Seven
  51. Chapter Forty-Eight
  52. Chapter Forty-Nine
  53. Chapter Fifty
  54. Chapter Fifty-One
  55. Chapter Fifty-Two
  56. Chapter Fifty-Three
  57. Chapter Fifty-Four
  58. Chapter Fifty-Five
  59. Chapter Fifty-Six
  60. Chapter Fifty-Seven
  61. Chapter Fifty-Eight
  62. Chapter Fifty-Nine
  63. Chapter Sixty
  64. Chapter Sixty-One
  65. Chapter Sixty-Two
  66. Acknowledgments

My phone buzzed. It was Dexter saying the plans were ready. He had made three copies and put them in a folder. He could drop them by tomorrow so I could study them before my presentation. My thoughts landed on Henry. And Griffin. These plans involved a big ask from them as well. I texted them and set up a meeting. My thoughts shifted to Griffin’s tattoo. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

I texted Lea. I wanted, no needed, her blithe spirit. We met at a Starbucks equidistant from VERT and the place she was increasingly calling home, NOIR. “It seems like you have been seeing more of my brother than I have lately. How’s Henry?”

When Lea blushed, I instantly knew. Their happiness sliced into my anxiety. “He’s good. Hank is just adorable. I’m sorry I haven’t been there much,” Lea said.

“Ah, new love takes time.” I knew my brother well. Now, this I had envisioned perfectly. “I’m going to make the pitch tomorrow afternoon to the boys. I’d like you to be there. I have to tell you, I have been scouting out potential office spaces. Ideally, I’d like you to come to work for me at least part time. But there’s something I would like you to do first.”

Chapter Fifty-Seven

Chapter Fifty-Seven

By morning, my fear had receded. Excitement had taken its place. The kind of excitement that blends anxiety and hope together. It looked lumpy and messy like me. All me.

I visited Daddy. He didn’t talk much anymore, but his face brightened when he saw me, as if inside his boarded-up brain there were glimmers of light and recognition of love. I grabbed his hand, and he rubbed his fingers over the wedding ring he had given my mother so many years ago. He was a safe repository for my hopes and doubts and even my dreams. I had a few of those left. I got up to leave and kissed his cheek. His hands still gripped mine.

“Beauty,” he struggled to say. I realized that my own motto of being unapologetic about being surrounded by beauty had simply been a derivative of his. In the end, we hold on to love, then beauty. I had been trying to do this all my life. Now I would try to convince the other two men who mattered most that I could bring fresh beauty back to VERT.