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Back A Train to Moscow: A Novel
Chapters (59)
  1. TITLE PAGE
  2. COPYRIGHT PAGE
  3. DEDICATION
  4. CONTENTS
  5. ACT 1 IVANOVO
  6. 1
  7. 2
  8. 3
  9. 4
  10. 5
  11. 6
  12. 7
  13. 8
  14. 9
  15. 10
  16. 11
  17. 12
  18. 13
  19. 14
  20. 15
  21. 16
  22. 17
  23. ACT 2 MOSCOW
  24. 18
  25. 19
  26. 20
  27. 21
  28. 22
  29. 23
  30. 24
  31. 25
  32. 26
  33. 27
  34. ACT 3 LENINGRAD
  35. 28
  36. 29
  37. 30
  38. 31
  39. 32
  40. 33
  41. 34
  42. 35
  43. 36
  44. 37
  45. ACT 4 IVANOVO-LENINGRAD
  46. 38
  47. 39
  48. 40
  49. 41
  50. 42
  51. 43
  52. 44
  53. 45
  54. 46
  55. 47
  56. 48
  57. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  58. DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
  59. ABOUT THE AUTHOR

The last thing Sasha wants is for Lara to relive that day, so she releases her from the hug, and Lara slides away, relieved not to be held, not to be touched. To get her mind off that day, it is now Sasha’s turn to unleash her secret, so she tells Lara about Andrei and Marik, about that day in the forest everyone still calls an accident in the woods. She tells Lara about the guilt she feels for leaving Andrei. She tells her how he begged her to stay and how she refused, even after the fire, even after his parents both died and his whole life went up in flames. She feels she betrayed him, she tells Lara. She is grateful to her friend for listening, for not holding her hand, and for not saying she is sorry. Like Lara, Sasha doesn’t want to be held. Unlike Lara, she is guilty.

Yet in her bones, Sasha knows how fortunate they are to be here, in this city and this school. She knows that acting will endow them with power, the power Lara lacked when she was in ninth grade. When they master its secrets of becoming someone else, Sasha says, Lara will be as liberated from her past as she is when she inhabits the characters in classic plays, strong yet conflicted, but always in control of their lives.

20

20

Despite her school faculty’s disdain for movies, the Mosfilm studio regularly scouts their hallways for fresh talent. Studio agents, unshaved men in denim and loose-haired women dressed in clothes they don’t see in stores, catch students between classes to invite them to screen tests, enticing them with fees only the studio can pay. During the spring semester, Sveta is offered the lead part in a film set in contemporary Moscow, and Sasha is invited for a supporting role in Rimsky-Korsakov’s film opera The Tsar’s Bride.

The studio sends its emissary to their dean, who has starred in many Mosfilm studio films himself, to plead for both of them. Sasha hopes the emissary is a green-eyed beauty in a peasant dress and no makeup, a look the dean is rumored to favor. But all that Sveta and Sasha can do to influence a favorable outcome is to sit on her bed and curse each other with the foulest epithets they can fish out of memory, a superstition for good luck Grandma and her mother both believe in. It turns out Sveta knows many more despicable obscenities, so for Sasha, this cursing session has become a learning opportunity.