“We’ll figure something out,” I said. “I’m thinking of a couple of possible places, we could put feelers out in one that’s close enough for everyone here to get to. A few of these places have small populations of B-listers, and I think it would be a good, easy place to learn the ropes.”

Flare 2.7

“I felt energized after,” I said.

“Can you elaborate on that?” Mrs. Yamada asked.

“My cousin remarked I looked better, more in touch with the world. Normally, I get these intrusive… non-thoughts.”

“Non-thoughts?” Rain asked.

“Like, not intrusive thoughts, not ideas that I can’t get out of my head, but my mind has these places it tries to go, and I reflexively shut them out. Like, one thing, I spent two years in the hospital and in the care home, obsessing,” I said.

“I know what you’re talking about,” Sveta said.

“Yeah. And I feel like I’ve devoted enough thought to that. Two years of time, more than a lifetime’s worth. So I lock up, mentally, or trip over the subject. I get that a lot as my mood gets worse. I have it for things I do, like using my powers. I had it a lot less after the day at the hospital.”

“Some people have physiological signs, feeling ill, headaches, breathing, when they’re trying to find an outlet for things they can’t otherwise express,” Mrs. Yamada said. “Others have habits, things or people they go back to, they could have needs or cravings.”

“What if the thing you turn to is also the thing that causes stress?” Kenzie asked.

“That is absolutely a thing that happens, Kenzie. It’s at the root of downward spirals like addiction or overeating. On a more subtle level, something like a panic disorder can self-reinforce because the panic provides relief, even as it makes the actual situations worse. I like that Victoria identified something that arrests or controls the downward spiral.”

“It’s the sort of thing I plan to do again,” I said. “Putting all the other stuff aside, distilling things down to the most basic route of helping people, in a way that’s good and healthy for me, too. Or—”

Mrs. Yamada had started speaking at the same time I added the ‘or’. We both stopped.

“Go ahead,” she said.

“Or where there’s bad, the good is enough to outweigh that bad and leave me better off,” I said. I shrugged.

“Here in the group, we often discuss the issues we’re facing, how we relate to what others bring up, and we talk about solutions. I’ll periodically try to turn things to more positive topics, but with six people here, it’s common for people to come to the session with something they want to delve into.