“I have school. I have the audition for the summer program in, like, a week and a half! We can’t go anywhere.”

He scrunches his eyes shut, nodding in a way that feels more for him than for me. “You’re right,” he says, walking over to where I sit. “You’re right. The audition. I’m so proud of you, Peak.” He leans down and kisses me. It feels so right, so loving, that I almost don’t realize what it is—a goodbye.

I grab on to his sleeve, but he shakes me off. “Ridley.”

“It wasn’t fair to ask. I’m not thinking straight.”

“Ridley, stop. Seriously, you’re scaring me. Stay here for tonight. It’ll be okay.”

He exhales, his nostrils flaring as he wipes at his eyes. “It will never be okay, Peak. That’s the thing.”

And then, before I even realize what’s happening, he’s shoved open my window and thrown his bag outside, putting his hands on the sill like he aims to follow.

“Wait.” And I thought there’d be more time before it all came crashing down, that we’d get at least a few months of happiness. I thought if we could just make it to summer . . . I can’t let him go out there alone, though, not like this.

“I’m coming with you.” I glance at my cello; I can’t help it, because leaving right now feels like losing it forever. Resentment rises up inside, choking me, but I swallow it down. There’ll be time to be pissed—at his parents for failing him, at the world for putting us in this situation, at him too maybe—later. When he’s safe.

He runs his hands through his hair, linking his fingers behind his head. “Peak,” he says, letting out a hard breath. “This isn’t—I’m trying to do the right thing here. I don’t want to—I’m not going to be your black hole too.”

And I swear to god, if I ever see his father again, I will claw his eyes out myself.

“I can decide for myself,” I say, even though this is the definition of forcing my hand, but whatever. I grab my book bag off my chair and shove some clothes inside. I know this is a terrible idea, probably the worst I’ve ever had, but if I can get him through the night, then we can come back and fix it all when he’s calmer and thinking straight. My parents are going to kill me, but I don’t see any other choice.

I zip up my bag and turn to look at him, hoping I look more confident than I actually feel. Inside my stomach is churning. “Okay, let’s go.”

Ridley drops his arms and looks at me. “I’m not worth it.”