“Madigan, I want to be with you, and I promise that you know everything now. I hated keeping it from you, and I will never put you in that position again. But that conviction will be on my record for years. People will continue to find out about it. It’ll hinder my chances for employment, and a lot of people won’t be as understanding as you are.”

“The heck with them. Maverick beat a man to a pulp for hurting Chloe. Did you know that?”

“No.”

“He did, and Zeke beat up a guy for talking shit about disabled kids. Ashley took the drugs that killed her because of some jerk at school talking shit about her, and Tank tracked him down and beat him unconscious. They could have killed any one of those people, and that’s just a sampling of the things that go on with Dark Knights families. They’re protectors, and you are, too, so don’t you dare minimize that part of yourself. I know how much it hurts to lose your best friend, and it sucks that it ended the way it did. But if you hadn’t stepped in, you don’t know if your sister would have survived the night. Or if she did, when it would happen again. You’d never forgive yourself if he put her in the hospital, or worse.”

“Jesus, Mads,” he said uneasily.

“It’s true. You need to face those facts. I know you’re consumed with guilt. I get it. But someone has to show you the other side of things. The awful what ifs. What if she lost the baby at his hands or if he’d hurt the baby?”

“I can’t think about that.”

“I know, but you have to hear it, so one day you can try to move past it and figure out your future.”

“Moving past it isn’t even a consideration. One of the reasons I don’t have a clue about what my future looks like is because I can’t see past the crushing guilt of what I’ve done. I can’t just pretend like it never happened. This will stick with me forever.”

“I don’t mean pretend like it never happened. I meant finding a way to forgive yourself so you can move forward. You might want to talk to a professional about how to deal with everything you’ve been through. You deserve to be happy and have a future and a career you love, and if we’re together, I will have your back no matter what people say, because protecting your sister was honorable, even if it ended tragically. You’ve paid the price for that, Tobias, and you’re right—everything that’s happened is a part of you now. But that conviction is not who you are. Do you hear me? It doesn’t define you, and you shouldn’t let it.”