It was as if the past year hadn’t happened. I found myself actually enjoying being out with Nick and the boys – even though it was just at a fast-food place. When we returned home, Nick volunteered to do the bedtime routine and, after the boys had changed into their pyjamas, all of us piled onto Leo’s bed. Now, Nick is reading a bedtime story. Even Finley is soaking this all up, despite him reading by himself these days. A warm glow of nostalgia builds inside me. In reality, this set-up had never once occurred when we were together. I always did the bedtime routine. Nick was either at work, or too tired from work, to do it. Somehow, now, in this moment, those facts melt away, and what’s important is the look of happiness, of love and contentment, on Finley and Leo’s faces. On Nick’s.

I have to make an excuse to leave the room before they notice I’ve tears in my eyes. Damn my emotions. I’ve done the right thing. I’ve done the best thing for the boys and for me. I couldn’t stay in an unhappy marriage; longer term, that would’ve been far more detrimental to the boys than us separating. And we were both unhappy come the end – there’d be no quick fix. Sometimes it’s better to look forward, not back; move on, rather than waste years attempting to mend what’s broken.

Barb’s voice in my head disagrees: You’ve made a mistake, Amber. I’ve been unable to bring myself to tell her about the difficulties – about how her son had put his family second, how her son’s attention had strayed to another woman. However frustrated she’s made me, I have managed to hold back. Save her feelings. Sometimes, I struggle. Sometimes I don’t think she deserves to be sheltered from the truth. Occasionally, I want to take her by her arms and shake her; tell her to wake up and realise her son is the one who made this happen.

But I don’t. For her sake, but probably more for Nick’s. Certainly not for my own. I have Richard now though, a new future ahead. No need to upset the apple cart any more than required.

‘It’s been lovely to see them, to be able to put them to bed. Thank you,’ Nick says as he joins me on the sofa twenty minutes later. He sits, somewhat awkwardly, at the far end.