‘Yes, because you’re dying anyway!’ she says. ‘It’s not like you’re giving up your freedom for long, is it? If you go to prison for withholding evidence – which you won’t anyway, I shouldn’t think – it’ll be for such a short space of time it won’t even matter. But you get to die with your conscience clear and that’s all you care about. You’re as evil as your damned brother,’ Barb shouts, her face contorting with rage. My jaw slackens. I don’t recall hearing Barb raise her voice to this extent before, and I certainly haven’t witnessed this level of anger. It unnerves me.

‘Maybe,’ he says.

‘She has a point, Patrick,’ I interrupt. ‘Tim has the chance at having his own family, and Nick has two sons to care for and support. By ensuring you’ve got justice, you’re ruining their lives, your great-nephews’ lives.’

‘Should’ve thought about that before they did what they did,’ he says, narrowing his eyes at Tim and Barb.

‘You didn’t think things through. You’ve admitted as much. Tim was a child, Patrick,’ Barb says. ‘Even as an adult you made the wrong choices; made a mistake. But you’re judging a child’s actions?’

‘He was seventeen – hardly a child.’

‘He was a young boy who’d just found out the most hideous thing about the man he lived with, looked up to, respected, loved. Can you even begin to imagine what he felt?’ Barb and Tim exchange quick glances, and I see Tim give a slight nod of his head before she turns back to Patrick. ‘And then to be confronted with that angry man, someone filled with rage because his secret was out … Seriously, Patrick – what would you have done if you’d been in his shoes? Bern launched himself at Tim, his fists raised, drool hanging in threads from his mouth like a rabid dog. Tim did the only thing he could. He protected himself. He protected me.’

Patrick’s eyes are glassy with tears. Who knows if they’re tears of sadness, guilt, compassion …? I’m praying for the latter right now. For us to be able to move on, for the Millers to be able to get away with it, Patrick has to concede; has to agree they only did what they had to do.

And that they should be left alone.

Patrick needs to say he’s happy to know the truth, and that’s all.

No justice-seeking. No revenge for his brother.

Just the Millers’ forgiveness for him leaving, and the knowledge he’s given them a chance at a future.

Surely, that will be enough.

Chapter One Hundred and Two

Barb

It’s eerily peaceful. Dark. The rain a few hours ago means the earth has softened a little.

Perfect conditions to bury a body.