But he didn’t give me a chance to explain. If only I’d known he was there, watching us, I would’ve stayed. I would’ve never gone back with David.

I’m left with so many questions and a feeling of incredible loss.

“He saw me. He was there, all the time. At the airport, on the bus, when I did the bike ride. All day. He was there. How did I not see him? How did I not know he was there? Aren’t you supposed to feel these things? How could I have been so blind?” I say when Alisa picks up.

“I know. I read it too last night. Maya, you didn’t know you were supposed to be on the lookout for him. You were alone in a new town. Everyone was a stranger.”

“Did you read the part about David?” I ask.

“Daniel, you mean? Ethan changed everyone’s name but yours. I wonder if Max asked him to keep yours as-is hoping you’ll read the book and recognize yourself in it.”

“Hah. He could’ve named me Princess Leia; I still would’ve known.”

“As for David, the whole thing made me so angry. Not only that he cheated on you, but also that he was so casual about it. I loved how Max wanted to punch him. I wish he had.”

“I wish Max showed up,” I say with a sigh. “I wish he told me the truth. I wish—” Tears pool in my eyes. “I can’t get this image out of my mind, of him standing there, wherever he was, having to watch me with David. That’s the worst part. He saw us kissing. He probably saw us leaving together. He thought he meant nothing to me. I hurt him. I hurt him, Alisa,” I say, desperately trying to stop the tears. “And I didn’t mean to.”

“I know,” she says.

“He thought I chose David over him and that day meant nothing to me.”

“Well, you did choose David and I’m not judging you; you picked the long-term ‘secure’ relationship over a day’s worth of messages from a stranger—”

“That’s not true. I would’ve stayed. If only I knew he was there somewhere. If only I knew he felt the same, I would’ve broken up with David then and there.”

“There are no guarantees in life, Maya. You should know that.”

“I didn’t want any guarantees.” I stop. “That’s a lie, isn’t it?” I ask, mostly myself.

“Yes, it is,” she says. Kindly.

“If I was sure of what I felt, I should’ve done it anyway. Risked it. Not give up so easily.”

“It doesn’t matter now. What’s done is done,” says Alisa.

“It does matter. He must hate me. All the things he felt for me that day must’ve transformed into hatred. I broke his heart. Ethan was right.”

“Maybe. Maybe not. You don’t hate him, and you haven’t hated him for the past year when you thought he stood you up. When you fall in love, you can’t easily let go of that feeling.”