I’m speechless.

“It’s uncanny, isn’t it? The resemblance to your Carmel story.”

Over the last year, Alisa has had to suffer through countless retellings, late-night analyses over Skype and ridiculous never-ending scenarios about that day.

“Yes, it’s uncanny.”

“It could be a coincidence,” she says.

“Max Meridian,” I repeat his name and start laughing.

It’s definitely a nervous laugh.

“Melodic name,” says Alisa.

“That’s not the point. Remember why I called him Max?”

“The Gladiator?”

“And what was his full name?”

“I don’t know. Maximus something.”

“Meridius,” I say.

“Jeez. The guy has a sense of humor,” she says.

“What did you say the author’s name is?”

“Ethan Delphy. Have you heard of him? Read any of his books?” she asks.

“No. I don’t think so. I just… I’m so confused. I don’t understand how this Ethan Delphy guy found out about my day.”

“I just read it to you. Inspired by the real-life love story of a young artist the author has known all of his life. I guess Max, or whatever his name is, and the writer are friends. If I was a writer, I could’ve written the story too. I know all the details. Maybe even better than you.”

“No, you wouldn’t have,” I say firmly.

“Why?”

“Because it’s not your story to tell.”

“You sound grumpy. I thought you’d be happy. You’ve been fixated on this man and that day. This is good news. We can reach out to Ethan Delphy, ask for the dude’s contact details, talk to him and that’s that. Finally getting what you want.”

“Yes, sure, I guess. Can I call you a bit later?” I ask.

“Sure. I’ll do some digging in the meantime.”

I think I should be happy like Alisa says, but instead, I’m numb. I’m having difficulty breathing as if a heavy weight is sitting on my chest.

I’ve spent this past year coming up with reasons why Max didn’t show up, why he didn’t contact me. I was convinced something must’ve happened. It sounds like nothing happened; he just made the decision not to come. But why? I don’t understand.

Just like I don’t understand why he’d tell someone about our day. It’s called a magical love story that changed him forever. So he did fall in love with me just like I fell in love with him. Then what happened? I need to know. I need to understand. I want him, whoever he is, to look into my eyes and tell me. He owes me at least that.

Alisa calls again. “I emailed his editor, but it’s Sunday so she might not respond. She’s in New York so it’s still early though. I asked for Ethan Delphy’s email address.”

“Do you think you could get the book?”

“I’m going to try to get an early review copy, yes. What’s the plan? You want to read the book before you get in touch with him?”

“I don’t know if I want to learn the truth from a book or if it’s better to hear it from him.”