Narvi had already worked it out. ‘He won’t do anything, stupid,’ he said. ‘What, and piss off the Old Man?’

Well, he had a point, I thought. I’d lost the one supporter on whom I might have depended if things got ugly in Asgard. Even Thor might have hesitated to lay violent hands on a man with a werewolf at his side.

‘Don’t think I’m scared of him,’ I said. ‘But sometimes it’s better not to jump at the first provocation. I won’t be much good to Fenris if I’m chained right next to him.’

Narvi gave me the look again. You know that look – the one that says: You can talk all you like, old man, but I know better, whatever you say.

Yes, I know that look all right. I may even have worn it myself on selected occasions. That’s why, of all human experiences, fatherhood is surely the most frustrating and pointless – because what’s the point of experience if your children won’t listen to what you’ve learned?

And so I went back to being Asgard’s official whipping boy. If anything happened, it was my fault: from the loss of Týr’s arm to the fact that Bragi’s new ode didn’t scan; to the failure of Sigyn’s cakes to rise; to the fact that the Ice Folk were gathering in Ironwood. I was the wrong note in the symphony; the cockroach on the wedding cake; the bear with its paw in the honey pot; the razor blade in the cookie jar. I’d never belonged in Asgard but never had it been so clear to me how much the gods resented me; hated me; wanted me out. Even my sons. Even Odin . . .

Yes, Odin. Now that he had what he wanted from me, the Old Man had finally dropped his pretence. His coldness towards me intensified; his birds were rarely out of my sight. I was puzzled, as well as hurt: especially as Odin still hadn’t mentioned Balder, or his prophetic dreams. It made me wonder if all this was about something bigger than just me. It made me wonder if Fenris had ever been their primary target. But most of all I wondered how long it would be before someone suggested that the Worlds might be a safer place if I, too, could be kept in chains . . .

Lesson 3 Cake

LESSON 3

Cake

Most problems can be solved through cake.

Lokabrenna