Without warning, the headline pops into my mind unwanted: Local Woman Dies from Tragic Cliff Fall; Body Washed Ashore Today. Chills spread through my body and I shiver. Angelica notices.

“Jane, let me show you where we’re meeting.” Angelica is giving me that sympathy stare, the one I despise. The one that says, Watch out for the grieving mom. She may be contagious. “I’m just so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine.”

No, you can’t imagine what I’m going through. I change the subject. “Are you excited for the end of the school year?”

“I am. It’s been a long one. It’s good to have the summer off. And you should know, Betsy is doing remarkably well, considering. The AP art teacher is impressed with her work this semester. I just wish she’d shown this effort a little sooner, a year ago, for the colleges. But she’ll be just fine.” Angelica holds the door to the office open for me and I walk inside.

I follow Angelica around the front desk where I used to sign the girls in and out for doctors, and dentists, for early dismissal sports, for pretend and real illnesses. Loretta is still there, still answering phones. Still pretending to believe excuses that parents concoct on behalf of their kids. I’m sure she’s heard every lie imaginable.

“Hey, Mrs. Harris. Good to see you.” Loretta waves before taking another call.

“I don’t know how she does it,” Angelica says.

Is she referring to me, or Loretta? The lies or the telephone calls? I don’t respond. We push through the door of the gym and enter a hive of senior kid and senior parent activity. I take a step back, but feel the pressure of Angelica’s hand in the small of my back, propelling me forward.

This is the last place in the world I want to be.

Betsy spots me. The feeling appears to be mutual.

“You came.” Betsy appears by my side. She knows Angelica is watching us, so she reluctantly smiles. “Hope you don’t mind getting paint on your new yoga outfit.”

I absorb the feigned display of affection, the offhanded compliment on the new and improved Jane, and give her a quick hug in return. “Of course I did. I wouldn’t miss this time with you.” We’re standing in front of what feels like the whole school and every mom associated with it. I’d say we’re giving a commanding performance.

Angelica beams. “You two have so much fun.” And then she’s gone.