The doorman signals to me that my car is here, and I move so quickly to get into the back seat where no one can see me. I concentrate on breathing and block out concerns for protecting my family. They told me I’m safe, they promised, so I have to believe them.

Walking into the apartment, all is quiet because it’s only around four pm and Forrest will be at work still, thank goodness. I don’t want anyone to see me like this.

Sweat runs down my back as I scurry to my room and strip off my clothes, walking straight into the shower. It’s what I need to bring me down and slow my thoughts. I’ll be okay, I always am, but I just need a few minutes here on my own to find my calm place.

Leaning with my head against the tiles, the water runs over my back. It’s so soothing, and I don’t know how long I stand here, but I start to realize that my skin is wrinkling, which means it’s been more than the five minutes I intended to take.

Wrapping the large fluffy cream towel around me, I remember I didn’t bring any clothes in with me, and just as I enter my bedroom, the door to my room comes flying open, banging back against the wall.

I scream in fright as Forrest comes bursting in, yelling at me.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were going home? You are supposed to tell me! There is no fucking security on that front door. I had to hear it from the Kentwall driver that you had been dropped off at home.” The pure rage pouring off him almost looks like it is mixed with intense fear on his face, and it’s directed straight at me.

“What is wrong with you? You scared the living daylights out of me. You can’t come barging into my room like that. What if I was naked!” I scream back at him because my anger and fear match his.

“I don’t give a fuck if you are naked, that’s better than being dead.” He waves his hands in the air at me.

“Now you are being dramatic. You all told me there is nothing for me to be worried about. Have you been lying to me, huh, have you?” Because although I’ve been freaking out in my head, I also reminded myself of how calm they all were and that they said it was low-risk, yet he comes tearing in here like a lunatic, worried that I’m dead because I didn’t call him.

Forrest is standing there looking at me with such fire but can’t seem to find his words.