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Chapters (43)
  1. Author’s Note with Content Warnings
  2. CHAPTER ONE
  3. CHAPTER TWO
  4. CHAPTER THREE
  5. CHAPTER FOUR
  6. CHAPTER FIVE
  7. CHAPTER SIX
  8. CHAPTER SEVEN
  9. CHAPTER EIGHT
  10. CHAPTER NINE
  11. CHAPTER TEN
  12. CHAPTER ELEVEN
  13. CHAPTER TWELVE
  14. CHAPTER THIRTEEN
  15. CHAPTER FOURTEEN
  16. CHAPTER FIFTEEN
  17. CHAPTER SIXTEEN
  18. CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
  19. CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
  20. CHAPTER NINETEEN
  21. CHAPTER TWENTY
  22. CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
  23. CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
  24. CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
  25. CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
  26. CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
  27. CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
  28. CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
  29. CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
  30. CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
  31. CHAPTER THIRTY
  32. CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
  33. CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
  34. CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
  35. CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
  36. CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
  37. CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
  38. CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN
  39. CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
  40. CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
  41. CHAPTER FORTY
  42. EPILOGUE
  43. Acknowledgments

“You know, I’ve fully had it with you,” Darcy hisses at Marcos, half-lunging across the table. Molly and the Beginners glance behind at the Reverend, who is still guffawing with Bill and Briggs. No one noticed Darcy’s outburst. “You can’t have it both ways. You can’t help us and these kids without snitching on these Goddamn people. You’re nervous to get involved, nervous what’ll happen if we get home and rat out Nightlight, nervous what your daddy’ll say, nervous kids at school will know you’re a big, snitching homo and you won’t be welcome back at your la-dee-da church. Sorry, but stay nervous. I’ve been busting my ass for months and so have these kids, doing things that could get our necks broke. You’re going to help us.”

“I’m sorry…” Marcos moans, unable to look up. “I just can’t.”

Darcy retrieves her lemonade, but she’s too shaking with rage to drink. “Connor, like I said before, Marcos has been at Nightlight for over half a year. Got here in January when I was on month two. His daddy is a preacher at some Texas megachurch, some widow-swindling—”

“—that’s not true—”

“—I ain’t finished. Some robbing, gangster, hypocrite preacher, and he’s going to Hell for it, saying nothing about being damned for what he’s done to his son. Marcos, you came here first week of January. That means the Carrillo clan had one last Christmas together, and then Happy New Year!—off to the island with you. Probably decided the whole thing over presents and ham.”

A bitter chill falls on the Gulch. We are stricken silent, both by what Marcos has been through with his family and the serious in-fighting going down just three tables away from the Reverend. Furious, exhausted tears pool in both Marcos’s and Darcy’s eyes, but it’s Marcos who speaks first: “You know nothing about my family.”

“I’ve been listening to your Expulsion horseshit since you got here. I know everything about your family.”

“I take this program seriously. It means something to me.”

“You deserve this place—”

“Don’t say that to him,” I interrupt.

“Marcos,” Molly interrupts with greater calm. “Whatever Christmas you had with your family, if things don’t change, you’ll be spending this Christmas with Briggs and Miss Manners.”

“And so, what, Nightlight closes?” Marcos asks, glowing with rage. “I leave before I’m ready and…my family just lets me back? I have Christmas with them again, no trouble? I am on this island helping people or I’m nowhere. I don’t have some fun aunt with a website like Drew Schreiber who could take me in. Every person I got in the world is wrapped up in the church. I was supposed to be valedictorian, but I dropped out to come here. You want to make me homeless? I’m a valedictorian…”