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Back Surrender Your Sons Save as PDF
Chapters (43)
  1. Author’s Note with Content Warnings
  2. CHAPTER ONE
  3. CHAPTER TWO
  4. CHAPTER THREE
  5. CHAPTER FOUR
  6. CHAPTER FIVE
  7. CHAPTER SIX
  8. CHAPTER SEVEN
  9. CHAPTER EIGHT
  10. CHAPTER NINE
  11. CHAPTER TEN
  12. CHAPTER ELEVEN
  13. CHAPTER TWELVE
  14. CHAPTER THIRTEEN
  15. CHAPTER FOURTEEN
  16. CHAPTER FIFTEEN
  17. CHAPTER SIXTEEN
  18. CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
  19. CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
  20. CHAPTER NINETEEN
  21. CHAPTER TWENTY
  22. CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
  23. CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
  24. CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
  25. CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
  26. CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
  27. CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
  28. CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
  29. CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
  30. CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
  31. CHAPTER THIRTY
  32. CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
  33. CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
  34. CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
  35. CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
  36. CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
  37. CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
  38. CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN
  39. CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
  40. CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
  41. CHAPTER FORTY
  42. EPILOGUE
  43. Acknowledgments

“We talk a lot about healing at Nightlight.” The Reverend raises his hands to a literally captive audience and continues: “In Luke, Jesus met ten men with leprosy. They yelled out, ‘Jesus, hello, Jesus, take pity on us!’ Jesus told them to drag themselves over to the priests, and as they went, they were healed.” The Reverend makes ten plucking gestures in the air, as if he’s removing each invisible leper’s affliction. “One came back to Jesus, one of the healed lepers, and praised God for returning him to good health. Jesus, in one of his moods,”—a jittery chuckle rises from the pews—“Jesus said, ‘Wait, but there’s only one of you. Didn’t we heal all ten lepers? Where are the other nine?’

“Where are the others?” The Reverend descends his stage, meeting Lacrishia’s eyes and then Drew’s; their heads drop in unison, lowered by the weight of his attention. The Reverend stalks his pews like a blackbird surveying its choice of roadkill. “Nightlight has healed many people. But where are they?” He glances at Briggs, who huddles in the open doorframe next to Archie, the tattling guard. “You came back. Where are your fellow campers?” Briggs’s eyes drop and glisten as if his heart was suddenly stung. “When you current campers are healed, which of you will come back to thank God?” One by one, the campers turn away as the Reverend approaches as a deathly shadow. The Beginner boys crumple in their seats, a trio of shoulders wilting like flowers in a cold snap. The Reverend’s presence is thrumming with wicked electricity.

But I was raised in the Reverend’s hellfire. This is nothing to me but another Sunday morning. When the Reverend’s Rolex-clad grip lands on my shoulder, Marcos jumps an inch off his pew, but I hold the man’s gaze as well as my breath. “Which of you will not return?” the Reverend asks, peering over his glasses.

The memory of his sugar plum tea wafts back to me.

I can’t go it alone forever, away from my family. I can’t pretend to be straight, but I can’t just say “peace, y’all” and leave my mom for good. She and I are going to be close again—this is temporary. Which means I can’t escape; I need to leave here on good terms. I’ll fake whatever I have to. I’m going to be the best camper Nightlight has ever seen.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

THE BIRTHDAY BOY