Listening to that Oprah podcast might be a good place to start.

Chapter Thirty-One

Julia

I have a lunch date with Eliza the next day.

Part of me wants to cancel. Has she heard about my fight with Grey? I don’t want to put either of us in an awkward or uncomfortable position.

I do want to stay in my pajamas and wallow in self-pity all day.

But the more I stew, the angrier—sadder—I get. It’ll be good for me to get out. And I genuinely enjoy spending time with Eliza. She’s nothing if nonjudgmental. Maybe she’ll have a nugget of wisdom or two to pass along.

Because I miss Grey. I want more than anything for us to make up. I feel horrible about how things went yesterday, and spent the night and the entire morning crying about it.

I hated going to bed alone.

I hated waking up alone even more. I love our Sunday morning routine of sex and coffee and breakfast at home.

Grey’s gotten my body trained to crave him the second I’m awake. It’s like clockwork. I open my eyes, smell him on my pillow, and poof.

I’m raring and ready to go.

I think about reaching out to him as I shower and get dressed.

I think about why he hasn’t reached out to me. His silence is deafening.

Then again, part of me appreciates the fact that I’ve had some space and time to work through my feelings. To, yes, wallow a bit in my self-righteous anger.

But now I just miss him. Even though I have no idea how to work things out. That urge to provide, to give the best to the people he loves—I can tell it runs deep in Greyson.

I never set out to change him. Like I told Grey, I’m not in the business of fixing or saving men.

But something has to change for us to work.

Something’s got to give if we’re going to be together for the long haul.

I’m scared we won’t be able to find common ground. What would that mean for Charlie Brown? What would our lives look like as co-parents? If we fucked up a relationship, are we going to fuck up parenting, too?

I meet Eliza at Craft Cafe. It’s a super cute—and super tiny—spot in an old Charleston single just off bustling Market Street.

Stepping inside, I slide my sunglasses onto my head. Eliza is waiting by the door. Her face creases into a warm smile as she holds out her arms.

“Hey, honey! How are you feeling?”

“I’m all right,” I say, my throat welling as she wraps me in a tight, familiar hug.

She pulls back. Hands still on my arms as she looks at me, brow furrowed.

“You sure? You sound a little upset.”

Jesus, why does she have to be so wonderful?

Why does Greyson’s entire family have to be so freaking wonderful?

“I’m…yeah. I’m not doing so great.”

“Aw, sweetheart, come here.” Eliza hugs me again, running a hand over my back. “I’m so sorry you’re upset. You don’t have to tell me anything. But just know I’m here to listen. Or just to sit with you. Whatever you need, Julia, I’m here.”