"I don't understand why you think two people who are clearly fucking madly in love with each other shouldn't take the final step and get married. It's preposterous to me."

I shake my head and avert my gaze, stopping to stare at the French doors. No matter what I say, it won't make a difference to James. He doesn't understand why we don't need a paper to keep our bond strong. There's nothing stronger than what we already have.

I'm ashamed though, because in a way, in some closed off chamber of my heart, I agree with him, and that's not fair to either of us.

My throat is sore and scratchy as I speak. "Do you really think Natalie would be okay with it?"

I can feel the weight of his stare on me while I gaze mindlessly out the window at the rippling water. The sun is fresh above the water right before its peak. It's enchanting and pulls me away from the torment between us. I can't bring myself to look at James because I'm so torn and upset inside. It's messing with my emotions.

Warmth blooms under my cheek. I'm avoiding him and I sense he gets that. A chuckle echoes along the corners of our intimate room. I frown and finally look down. He's smirking in disbelief and beholding me with stupefied eyes.

"You're kidding me, right?"

"I'm dead serious."

He pops his head up and places his chin in his palm. "You and I live together. When she visits, she sits on the bed we have sex in every day. You think she'd object to us getting married?" We're both quiet. "Tell me my daughter is not the reason you won't marry me."

Humiliation invades me. My reasoning sounds like total bullshit now and messes with my feelings. I'm saddened that in all the days we've been together, this is our first real fight, and it’s over marriage.

"Did you forget how she reacted to us dating and how long it took her to come around? She's going to be ten times worse over marriage. I'm not going to lose my best friend completely when there's no reason if everything is fine the way it is, which it is."

"It's not fine the way it is," James spits out, then rolls out of bed to pace the floor.

My eyes widen as hurt consumes my heart. I lower my voice and say, "Wow. I had no idea you were so miserable."

"What makes you think she'd react the same way, anyway?" he challenges, throwing his arm in the air. A colorful blur of inked hues crosses my gaze. Frustration drips from him when I don't say anything. "You don't know. You're just scared to take the plunge because you think you have bad luck and it's the reason all the good things in your life are taken from you. Guess what? You had shitty luck before you met me, and you already took a risk with me. Yeah, it fucking backfired on us because it wasn't under normal circumstances, but look at us now. I'm the one good thing that has made it this far with you, because it was meant to fucking happen." James pauses, his eyes wild. "I'm not going anywhere, sweetheart. We're only going to get better from here on out. I just wish you’d open your eyes so you don't waste time trying to fight it and enjoy what we have."