I think the expression on my face must say it all, because Alfie seems to deflate a little. And at this, I finally feel ashamed. I should have brought it up earlier, no matter how heinously uncomfortable, to explain to him I don’t have feelings for him. It was cruel of me to leave him to dwell on this, hoping my silence told him everything he needed to know. Worse, it was cowardice. Certainly not something a Good Person does to her friends.

“Look, Rosie, I just want to make sure we’re still friends. I don’t want things to become awkward between us because of one stupid kiss. That’s all.”

That’s all? Relief drains all the tension from my body in a gush, and I nod eagerly. “I completely agree. Not that I could ever stop being friends with you.”

“Really?” he asks, and there’s that stab of shame again.

“Of course not. It’s not like that at all. I am sorry for not bringing it up sooner, though.”

He gives me a smile that certainly seems genuine. “What did your family say?” he asks.

I roll my eyes. “Take a guess. Go on.”

He pretends to mull it over. “Hmm. I would imagine they loved the positive attention it got you in the papers. And the fact that it drowned out the mean stories for a week or so. And that they were rapturous at the prospect of having me as a future son-in-law. I hope they take the disappointment of this well, by the way.”

“Very accurate,” I say. “Particularly the part about the papers. I think they were rather hoping we’d do it again.” I realize too late this sounds as though I’m hinting I would like the same, and stifle a groan.

“Well, there’s no reason we can’t give them more to write about, is there?” he asks.

I cock my head. “Uhh…”

“Oh, don’t look so panicked, Rosie, I mean platonically. Only they don’t have to know it’s platonic. We could fake date!”

“Fake date?” I echo.

“Absolutely. We can catch up in person a couple of times, maybe hold hands for the cameras, and bam. You get more stories that have nothing to do with your many flaws.”

I blink in surprise. “And what do you get?”

“More time hanging out with you,” he says simply. “You can be hard to pin down, you know. Plus, I think it’ll be extremely funny to watch them take things and run with them. It means we can control the narrative for once.”