I’m having fun, and when I finish, I’m proud and satisfied. At least, until I look around to find Rose holding her phone up and filming me. “That was amazing,” she says.

“Delete it,” I say automatically.

She holds up her free hand and drops the phone into her lap. “Hold on. I will if you want me to—”

“I do.”

“But I had a thought while you were playing. Maybe you could put it online? Or Molly could, or something. You have to get used to playing in front of people, right? Could this be an intermediary?”

Put up a video of me baring my soul for strangers to judge and critique? Is she serious right now? I open my mouth to say no, absolutely not, but then I catch myself.

Rose notices my hesitation, and places a gentle hand on my knee. “If you never take the first step toward where you want to be, you’ll stay right where you are,” she says. “You can’t teleport yourself to your destination.”

I’ve never thought about it that way. But maybe Rose has a point. I’ve been so preoccupied by where I want to be one day—an orchestra member in my realistic dreams, and a soloist in my wildest—and how far away from those dreams I am, that I’ve let myself get totally overwhelmed. But I don’t have to become that person yet. The only thing I have to do right this second is a single step.

I can take a step, can’t I? It’s a terrifying one, and the thought of it makes me want to bury myself under my bedcovers and never come out, but it’s not impossible. And, yeah, maybe people will make fun of me in the comments, or in a private chat. But maybe they won’t. Maybe Maddison and her friends were a blip. Maybe it’s time I find out for sure. After all, so far, the Bramppath girls don’t seem to hate my guts. Even if they do kind of hate my clothes.

I’d have to review the video first, obviously, to make sure it sounds as good on camera as I thought it did in real life. But at least this would be controlled. I wouldn’t have to worry about messing up the notes, or panicking, because I’ve already played it.

“Can you send it to me?” I ask finally, and she does.

It’s really late by the time I gather all my stuff and we leave the ballroom. Late enough that we should be calling it a night. In the courtyard, we pass Harriet doing her rounds—every RA is responsible for clearing out and locking up one area of the school each night, and she told me once hers is the library. Even the hallway is empty, which means everyone’s done brushing their teeth and using the bathroom.