Malik proceeded to talk through some of his troubles, from how hard it was to make friends out here to how badly the Pistons were playing to wondering if his time in the service was done. At first it was annoying, but then, the longer Antony listened, the more he noticed how much it was relaxing him. Malik didn’t want anything from him, really, other than to have someone who was willing, even for just twenty minutes, to care about him.

The door opened.

“Would you ever go through?” Antony asked Malik.

In there today, it was summer. The light bright, the trees green and gold. It was easy to see why his daughter loved it so much. His father was whistling again.

“Absolutely not,” Malik said. Antony noticed how much the other man’s posture had changed. “I hear the voices of every dead person I’ve ever known whenever that thing opens. In there is death.”

“But you could bring them back.”

“One weird white guy claims it happened.” Malik had pulled out a cigarette. He rolled it between his fingers, tapped it against his lips. He was not supposed to smoke. Antony felt certain that if Malik ever smoked in front of him, it would mean they had worked their way into a friendship.

He could see Malik weighing two opposing thoughts: the pleasure of wanting to believe people were capable of miracles and the agony of knowing how often people lied to get what they wanted.

“Do you think all this”—Antony gestured toward the barn, the door, himself, as if that would be enough to communicate what he was asking about his faith, the way he had chosen to live his life—“is too weird?”

“I think everyone, whether they like it or not, is obsessed with death. If you have a religion, in some way, you’re making a choice about what you think death is.” Malik put the cigarette back and clapped his hands together. The snow came down harder. “Listen to me being wise and shit.”

When Antony got home, Ayanna and his grandmother were awake again and splitting a slice of cake. The two of them were laughing together, and as he watched them in the moment before they noticed him, everything he was worried about felt smaller. They were on the right path, Antony promised himself.

5

Ayanna and Olivia prepared for Confirmation in their churches at the same time. Olivia, who was getting confirmed later than usual because her mother hadn’t thought she was ready at fourteen, went to classes on Sunday afternoons in the church basement after Mass. There, she learned about the seven gifts of the Holy Spirit. She texted jokes to her friends under the table or read the one cool eighth grader’s notes or continued her ironic doodle series of anthropomorphic household objects. There were kids in the class who cared a lot, but they were considered weird and kiss-asses.