2[something]PM–11:27PM: alec woke me once but i was too sleepy. we had plans to walk around the RISD museum with alexandra at 3PM. alec woke me again, saying something like ‘do you want to shower?’ i said ‘no, i’m fine.’ the shower thing was repeated…walking around…groggily…alec said ‘sometimes some people like to shower in the morning, i don’t know, i didn’t know if you wanted to do that.’ there wasn’t enough time for me to shower, i thought, even if i wanted to. i felt inhibited. alec had been up for a while. i wasn’t sure how to act. felt like the thing i wanted to avoid by not doing sexual things had already…it was just there, i wasn’t able to avoid it. some kind of tension. i didn’t want the tension. gave alec choline and aniracetam. he requested ‘less than [i] usually take,’ in a way that stuck out to me. i think because normally people i’m giving drugs to don’t specify the amount of drugs they want. if an amount is requested, i think it’s usually for more than less drugs. i ate the amount i usually eat. alec said ‘it’s making me feel groggier i think.’ i said ‘shit…’

i drove us to a coffee place, where alec went inside to buy coffee for alexandra and me and i stayed in the car, before picking her up at her house. when alec returned to the car with coffee we said things about directions, then something i forget, then it was quiet. i said ‘i wish we had been filming the argument last night, it was so funny.’ alec said ‘it was,’ and something about how it was better or more special, that there wasn’t a video.

parked on the hill outside alexandra’s house. noticed a ‘butter colored’ lion sculpture on the porch. i pointed and said ‘look, butter lion.’ alec looked in the direction i pointed. i said ‘it’s the same color as the staircase last night, butter color. lots of butter here. rhode island.’

i paid to get into the museum and students got in free. alec said something funny about…like as soon as we got our ‘clippy shirt visitor tags’ he said something about a nearby pole, like ‘so what aspects of this, uh, er…what aspects should we be taking note of, here?’ we walked around a log cabin-like area with desks, pretending it was art.

the museum felt like that part in ‘ferris bueller’s day off’ where they walk around the museum. the first painting i saw was a giant bright red neon opitical illusion-type painting. stood close to it and went ‘whoa.’ read the plaque about it. i forget what the plaque said. alec approached me, still looking at the red thing, and said ‘look at this.’ it was a painting of impressionistic grayish brown splotches. think the plaque said something about the holocaust. i pointed to a splotch and said ‘so what’s this part, is this part anne frank?’ alec said the red painting was anne frank, actually.