10:39pm: I have a lot of drugs on me. Took a variety of what Google searches confirmed were opiates, seemingly hidden in vitamin bottles of dad’s. Driving back to NYC now. Ate 10mg opana.

11:15pm: smoking clove cigarette I found in storage unit. Must be from 2005. Still ‘works.’

11:34pm: peeing in rest stop. As I was writing that and peeing I thought ‘I’m peeing my pants.’ I really felt like I was and got confused and worried. Still feels that way a little. Funny twitter exchanges with gian.

JUNE 15, 2013

5:00am: met [omitted] in bay ridge. got drinks at two places. had sex in park by Verrazano bridge.

6:14am: ate bacon egg and cheese items and donuts with [omitted] at dunkin donuts on 116th st.

7:30am: had sex in my apartment. [omitted] washed my back in shower via grass rash from park. Ate Xanax. Fell asleep holding each other.

11:29am: woke. had sex. Two orgasms. Heheheh. [omitted] showered and helped me bring in mirror from hotel furniture resale store. Drove to his apartment, to meet his parents. Last night and this morning talked about ‘what it is we’re doing together, exactly.’ established mutual unusual attraction and excitement. Bailed on lunch with his parents. Have been sending text messages back and forth about stuff we want to do together.

12:[something]–4:[something]pm: drove alone to Bedford L stop area. There was some kind of annoying street festival. Ate 60mg morphine. Bought green juice. Got a free iced coffee and tipped a dollar. Ran into Sam Cooke and his girlfriend on street. He introduced us. I thought ‘she doesn’t know why this is awkward but Sam and I do.’ Told them I was sleepy and on morphine. Ate 1mg Xanax, half a bahn mi sandwich, and ice cream cone from pale yellow ‘van heusen’ ice cream van. From ‘organic planet’ grocery store, bought: three coconuts, three avocados, Dr. Bronner’s rose soap, ‘skin detox’ tea, two pints van heusen ice cream, half pint raw cinnamon vanilla ice cream, candle.

6:00pm: driving home from Bedford ave area. Texted Chelsea and Mira. Made plans with Mira to go to tyrant books reading tonight.

6:37pm: lit candle in car. Feeling good.

7:33PM: back at apartment. put away groceries. snorted 30mg morphine and prepared things in bag for tonight. the new lamp looks good. mira didn’t text that she’d left for reading yet.

7:36pm: driving to reading instead of taking train. Met ‘Eddie’ on the street. He had a USarmy flag on his bike and talked about believing in karma and the law, not like ‘the lord,’ the law, and pointed to the sky. Ate maybe 60mg morphine. Earlier ate a concerta to wake. Unsure if I like morphine.

8:01pm: ate 1mg Xanax.

8:03pm: made illegal u-turn. Stephen said they hadn’t started yet.

8:32pm: about 20ppl milling around in tiny beer cigarette room. Saw Stephen and moon temple and theo then Lucy came in. Mira bailed. Peeing now.

10:57pm: talking w/moon walking to my car.