i tend to date skinny guys but i like me a big hulking hulk of a big man. like. oof. muscles. oof. louis could destroy me. love me a man big enough to destroy me. oof. oof.

louis said ‘you want me to take that cardboard?’ i said ‘no, i’ll put it in the basement.’ followed him to the door and said ‘here, i want to give you this’ and handed him $29. thought i had more. his face brightened.

the light in my lamp went out as i put the table in front of it. then i did dishes and cleaned countertops and fed cats.

then mom called. ‘jolly’ conversation. i told her about louis and jumping on the bed and she said ‘oh no!’ i said ‘no, he didn’t mean it like that, like jumping in bed with me. it was me. who thought that. my mind was in the gutter.’ she said ‘bad megan.’

she and dad decorated his new office today. there was an issue with carpeting, a woman tripped and fell near a lamp. mom and dad were trying to figure out where to put the lamp. mom said ‘don’t be afraid of the lamp, mike.’ she described dad straightening his back and looking at her curiously and saying ‘i’m not afraid of the lamp.’ she said ‘it was a ‘male’ thing, this fear of the lamp, i think.’ we talked for maybe 25 minutes. i said ‘i’m happy you’re calling me a lot, i’ll call you more too.’ she said ‘honey i really think—when i say something like ‘you should buy flowers for your table,’ don’t take that seriously. i think you can do whatever you want.’ felt flummoxed. i said ‘i know, it’s okay, i don’t think…i forgot you said that, i think it’s nice that you said that. i was thinking about buying a plant.’ she said ‘i think that’s a great idea, aren’t there plants cats like to eat?’ i said ‘yeah, yeah, there are, i didn’t even think to do that. i just threw away cat grass that got old but i could grow it, for shirley. shirley likes cat grass.’ mom said ‘oh, shirley. i like picturing you with the kitties. will you send me pictures on the computer? i can’t do it on my phone for some reason.’ i said ‘i’ll send you pictures. the apartment looks like somewhere someone who ‘has it together’ would live now. it’s weird. i feel better now, having a bed. it’s stupid, but thank you a lot.’ mom said ‘no, i think that’s absolutely true. sleeping in a bed helps, it’s a wonder what sleeping in a bed does, i think.” she was going home to eat burger king she and dad bought, and watch a thing on HBO where michael douglas plays liberace and matt damon plays his ‘young male lover.’

drinking a beer on the bed currently.

MAY 27, 2013