8:27PM: A FEW HOURS AGO:

mom: [sits on piano bench] i want to visit you on friday, we can go to ikea. i don’t want you to think i don’t want to visit, i just need to be asked to visit.

me: i want you to visit. will you visit?

mom: yes. i’ll visit friday.

A FEW HOURS AFTER THAT:

me: [entering kitchen, mom on couch] there’s an ikea ferry, when you visit we can take the ferry.

mom: i want to take the ikea ferry! where does it go?

me: just to ikea, i don’t think other places.

mom: of course, where else would it go, haha. we’ll get you things at ikea.

me: great. i think i only need a bed frame, it would be fun to go to ikea with you though.

mom: what about your old bed frame?

me: that was zachary’s. the mattress didn’t quite fit it anyway.

mom: what about the white one from dad’s house?

me: my mattress is too small for it, i think. then the one from my baltimore apartment is broken, then the other one from brooklyn broke too. i can just sleep on a mattress.

mom: don’t sleep on just a mattress! you and dad can use the u-haul.

me: good idea.

A FEW HOURS AFTER THAT:

dad: i heard your mattress might be too small for the frame, from mom, so maybe we should use the u-haul tomorrow morning to—

me: oh yeah, the u-haul. we can go to ikea tomorrow.

dad: well ikea is far away, so i thought mattress discounters would be good.

me: i don’t care. i have no preferences. mom said ikea.

dad: it’s just that ikea is, i don’t know where it is in relation to the storage closet, but we have mattress discounters right here by—

me: yeah, yeah. i don’t know. i don’t care at all, about where. any of this.

dad: well okay sweetie, i’ll see you soon.

8:4[something]–9:16PM: slept. mom woke me to ask if i wanted food, said ‘oh i guess you don’t, you’re asleep.’

10:32PM: dad brought home bar-be-que. there was an extra pork sandwich, in case i got hungry. stood by dad and picked at food. he said ‘do you want me to wake you with coffee, like in the old days?’ i said ‘yeah, yeah, at seven-thirty, that would be good.’ he asked how far i had gotten into ‘homeland’ and i said ‘somewhere near the last episode.’ he said watching it before bed made him tense. i said ‘i don’t want to watch it tonight either.’ dad said ‘me neither.’ he was preparing coffee, said ‘oops, this one isn’t ground,’ about a bag. i concentrated on eating. mom talked about ‘mad men.’ dad said ‘i might watch.’ i said ‘does it matter what’s happening on it? would i get it?’ mom said ‘well it’s, er. nineteen sixty-three, i think, it’s right after martin luther king was assassinated. no, it can’t be that early. mike?’ dad said ‘yes, it was nineteen sixty-three, no, i remember very well, i was sitting on my lawn saying the rosary, the day martin luther king died.’ he paused, said ‘no! that was john f. kennedy. it was nineteen sixty-six.’ mom said ‘nineteen sixty-six, yes. because of the music.’ dad said ‘people were swinging to the music.’ he said ‘oh look, this bag is already ground.’ i said ‘oh good, a grounded bag.’ i knew if i stood by him, picking at food, it would take him long time to finish the coffee. i wanted to be quiet. i got a cold water bottle from the fridge and said ‘will you leave everything out, just like that?’ dad said ‘the food? just like this?’ i said ‘yeah, just like that. i’ll finish it,’ and felt a little sad.