She tries to pay him, but he won’t let her. But she’s also trying to get the house ready to sell, because she’s moving with Lucy to Dallas in January. She was worried about uprooting Lucy, but I think she’s young enough that she’ll be fine.

My mom is totally and completely still in love with Phillip. And the feeling is mutual.

For the first time in a really long time, I feel at peace. I don’t worry about my mom and Lucy. I know they’re taken care of. The only thing I have to worry about is keeping my grades up, and that hasn’t been too difficult.

But after my classes on Friday, I drive out as far as I can from town, finding an abandoned road, just as the sun is going down. I look up, searching for the stars.

I sit on the tailgate of my truck and wonder what everyone back home is doing. What he’s doing. Mom wants me to come back for Thanksgiving break, but I don’t know about that. It’s been so freeing to be here, not having to hide who I am.

I don’t think I can force myself back into the box to return to Kensley.

But Kingston said he has to work the Friday after Thanksgiving, so he can’t make it here. And God . . . I want to see him so damn badly.

I always want to see him. Feel him. Touch him. I should have just given in and fucked him when he was here.

But that would have been selfish. He’s given me so much. He deserves to find someone—anyone other than Kennedy—to spend the rest of his life with. The nice, quiet small-town life he craves.

When it gets dark out, I look up at the sky and smile at the stars. Taking a picture, I send it to Kingston.

Kingston: Huh. Hold please.

He follows that with a very similar picture of his own dark night sky and stars sparkling in the distance.

Kingston: Holy shit. You can see the stars. Unless you’re here?

I grin at my phone.

Me: Nah. I had to drive a little, but not that far.

Kingston: Glad you can still see them.

Me: Me too.

I want to tell him how much I miss him. That I’m in love with him. That as much as I love school, I’d leave it if I could have him because he’s all I’ve ever really wanted, even though I didn’t let myself feel that.