‘I told you they left before I’d opened the door!’

‘Well, I’m sorry, madam, but I’m not sure what you expect me to do about it.’

‘I expect you…’ I took a moment to swallow another mouthful while trying to calm down enough to speak instead of shriek. ‘To refund me the extra delivery money, and then send someone out to take my new bed upstairs and then remove the old bed, as paid for.’

‘Certainly, madam. Let me check the system for you… One moment please… One moment… Yes, I’ve booked you a bed removal for the twenty-second of July.’

‘What!? That’s over two months away! I can’t leave a bed and a mattress outside my front door for weeks on end. And even if I could drag them inside, my house is tiny; there’s no space until the old bed is gone.’

‘Well, drag the old bed outside, then.’

‘Move an iron bed, single-handed, down the stairs and outside, where I have to leave it on the pavement until your company can be bothered to come and do the job I paid them to do today?’

‘I’m sure you can ask a friend to help.’

‘Really? For all you know I don’t have any friends!’

I hung up, eyes smarting with frustration.

I did have friends. I had Steph and her family. Who were on holiday in Cornwall for the week. I had Karina, who had taken Mum to Matlock for the day. I had… Joan.

I waited until nine o’clock, not wanting to disturb anyone’s weekend lie-in.

‘Hello?’ Joan answered the door eventually. She was already dressed in grey jersey shorts and the same T-shirt as the day before. She had The Fellowship of the Ring dangling from one hand, her finger propping open the page. ‘Oh, hi, Ollie.’

‘How’s everyone getting on – still in Rivendell?’

Her face lit up. ‘Under the Misty Mountains!’

We chatted for a few moments about the story, before I got to the point. ‘Is your mum around? I’ve had a mess-up with my bed delivery and I need an extra pair of arms.’

Joan’s expression went blank. ‘She’s at work.’

‘Okay. When will she be back?’

Panic flickered through her eyes, like a fish darting through a riverbed. ‘Not till this afternoon. And then she’ll need to sleep. She gets really tired after working all day.’

‘What does she do?’ I tried to sound curious, not concerned.

‘She’s a cleaner. She does Hatherstone Hall weekday mornings, and then some houses in the afternoons but on Saturday she spends the whole day at the hall. She goes on her bike.’

‘And then she sleeps? That doesn’t sound like much fun.’

‘She’s not very well at the moment. That’s why she has to sleep so much.’

‘Is there anyone else here to look after you?’