So, with no small sense of trepidation, on full alert for any sign of her old tricks and more than ready to implement a swift retreat if required, I began texting every few days. Keeping it light and simple, I asked her for a recipe, sent a photograph of a deer I spotted in the forest, had a brief conversation about my cousin’s engagement to a woman he’d met online six weeks earlier. Mum sometimes replied immediately; other times it was several hours before an answer pinged through. Her messages were polite and cautious, which made me grateful and relieved yet at the same time peeved and lonely.

Aunty Linda wasn’t wrong when she said it would be complicated.

But it was a start.

In between these messages I welcomed some new ReadUp clients to replace Yasmin and Trev and managed various issues cropping up in my coaching team. I sat in on the Business Builders meetings, which only grew more bizarre each week. I coerced Irene into chatting with me and met Yasmin in the park so she could train me and play with Nesbit. On one sunny Saturday I ate breakfast with Steph and took Nicky on a bike ride through the forest.

I tried to organise a party that was worthy of the Dream List – the kind of party I would have wanted a man who was deliriously in love with me to arrange – even as I fought the urge to cancel, wrestling with feeling overwhelmed and deciding that I hated parties, so why should I be forced to have one for my own birthday.

I rattled around my empty house, and nursed my emotional bruises with dog walks and long-drawn-out nights staring at the ceiling forcing myself to count my blessings, of which I knew there must be many. I sent Joan updates about Nesbit, as promised, and snippets of trivia about how the forest was getting ready for autumn. She replied with streams of follow-up questions, while ignoring all mine about how she was settling in. I tried not to worry, reminded myself that she was with a family who loved her and got back to organising my party. Around ten days after they’d left, Carole phoned to say that she didn’t think they’d be coming back for my birthday. At first she blamed it on Leanne’s health, but when I offered to come and see them instead, she admitted that Joan was still struggling to adjust and she thought it best to wait. I was tempted to cancel the party altogether.