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Contents ( 161)
  1. Dedication
  2. Epigraph
  3. Contents
  4. Prologue
  5. June 23, 1988
  6. Part One
  7. February 2016
  8. Chapter 1
  9. Audrey
  10. Chapter 2
  11. Jess
  12. Chapter 3
  13. Lily
  14. Chapter 4
  15. Audrey
  16. Part Two
  17. March
  18. Chapter 5
  19. Audrey
  20. Chapter 6
  21. Lily
  22. Chapter 7
  23. May 2009
  24. Chapter 8
  25. Jess
  26. Chapter 9
  27. October 1987
  28. Chapter 10
  29. Jess
  30. Chapter 11
  31. Audrey
  32. Part Three
  33. April
  34. Chapter 12
  35. Audrey
  36. Chapter 13
  37. April 1972
  38. Chapter 14
  39. Lily
  40. Chapter 15
  41. Jess
  42. Chapter 16
  43. September 1988
  44. Chapter 17
  45. Audrey
  46. Chapter 18
  47. July 2003
  48. Chapter 19
  49. Audrey
  50. Part Four
  51. May
  52. Chapter 20
  53. Audrey
  54. Chapter 21
  55. Audrey
  56. Chapter 22
  57. Audrey
  58. Chapter 23
  59. Lily
  60. Chapter 24
  61. Christmas Day 1988
  62. Chapter 25
  63. Audrey
  64. Chapter 26
  65. Jess
  66. Chapter 27
  67. Audrey
  68. Chapter 28
  69. Lily
  70. Chapter 29
  71. Jess
  72. Chapter 30
  73. Lily
  74. Chapter 31
  75. Audrey
  76. Chapter 32
  77. Jess
  78. Chapter 33
  79. Audrey
  80. Chapter 34
  81. June 1988
  82. Part Five
  83. June
  84. Chapter 35
  85. Audrey
  86. Chapter 36
  87. Lily
  88. Chapter 37
  89. Audrey
  90. Chapter 38
  91. Audrey
  92. Chapter 39
  93. Jess
  94. Chapter 40
  95. Lily
  96. Chapter 41
  97. Audrey
  98. Chapter 42
  99. Jess
  100. Chapter 43
  101. Lily
  102. Chapter 44
  103. Audrey
  104. Chapter 45
  105. Jess
  106. Chapter 46
  107. June 1988
  108. Chapter 47
  109. Jess
  110. Part Six
  111. July
  112. Chapter 48
  113. Jess
  114. Chapter 49
  115. Lily
  116. Chapter 50
  117. Audrey
  118. Chapter 51
  119. Lily
  120. Chapter 52
  121. Audrey
  122. Chapter 53
  123. Lily
  124. Chapter 54
  125. Audrey
  126. Chapter 55
  127. Jess
  128. Chapter 56
  129. Audrey
  130. Chapter 57
  131. June 22, 1988
  132. Chapter 58
  133. Audrey
  134. Chapter 59
  135. Lily
  136. Chapter 60
  137. June 23, 1988
  138. Chapter 61
  139. Jess
  140. Chapter 62
  141. Audrey
  142. Chapter 63
  143. Jess
  144. Chapter 64
  145. Lily
  146. Chapter 65
  147. Jess
  148. Chapter 66
  149. Audrey
  150. Part Seven
  151. November
  152. Chapter 67
  153. Jess
  154. Chapter 68
  155. Lily
  156. Chapter 69
  157. Audrey
  158. Acknowledgments
  159. About the Author
  160. Copyright
  161. About the Publisher

“OK, as you know, we’ll be singing just one song in the concert, so we need to make sure it has real impact. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what it should be and I hope you’re going to approve of my choice. It’s Nina Simone’s ‘I Wish I Knew How It Would Feel to Be Free.’ Caitlin’s handing around song sheets now, but I expect most of you know it anyway. If you read through the lyrics, I hope you’ll agree they’re pretty fitting for this concert.”

Audrey smiled as she remembered the first time she’d heard the song, sitting on the mustard-yellow rug in Sandra Bailey’s front room nearly fifty years before, Sandra’s eyes luminous with anticipation: Just you wait, Auds. Just you wait till you hear this album. You’ve never heard anything like it. Sandra pulling the vinyl from its paper sleeve and lowering it onto the record player as carefully as a mother placing her baby in a crib. Lifting the stylus, balancing it delicately on her forefinger, gliding it through the air, and lowering the needle into one of the shiny grooves. The familiar crackle of static, the expectant whirring of near-silence before it began: that mournfully optimistic piano introduction, just the lightest accompaniment of brushes from the drums before the decisive finger-clicking. And then the voice, Nina’s voice, inviting you into a musical world of hope and regret, longing and ambition. The lyrics touching Audrey in a way no song ever had before, with its impassioned advocacy of freedom, opportunity, choice. There being a feeling of certainty in that moment, a feeling that anything was possible. And when Nina’s voice had faded away, Audrey and Sandra had turned to one another and, without either of them speaking, Sandra had lifted the record player’s arm and moved it back half an inch, setting it down at the beginning of the song. And the two of them had listened again. They had listened in silence, five, six, seven times, until Sandra’s mum had burst through the living-room door and told them to turn the record off before they wore it out.

Audrey had only been fifteen, but she had known songs like that were rare: songs that made you understand something you couldn’t otherwise articulate, something you could only feel and were a better person for having felt it.

Now, almost five decades later, Audrey heard that piano introduction again, and as her diaphragm expanded and she joined in with the opening line, she felt the physical pleasure of singing with nearly a hundred other voices. As they sang through the whole song Audrey wondered why on earth she had left it so long to do something that gave her such joy.

They reached the end and Ben grabbed at the air with his fist, ninety-three voices coming to a standstill, only the echo of the final note hovering in the air as though it wasn’t quite ready to leave. “Wow, guys, that was really good. A genuinely impressive start. Keep that up and you’re going to be great.”