Gideon wants to stick it in you! It’s SO obvious! Who makes a playlist like this for a girl they’re not into? What kind of guy takes the time to do this for his GIRLFRIEND’S SISTER?!

And I’m sorry, but his tone is super flirty, too.

Parisa

That’s just the way he talks to everyone.

Gabriela

Well, if I were you, I wouldn’t tell your sister about this email. She will go apeshit!

Parisa

You’d be surprised. She’s VERY secure.

Gabriela

Well, maybe she shouldn’t be. I’m not sure I trust a guy who would be that bold with his GIRLFRIEND’S SISTER. Or a guy who’d hate on BTS so much. #Snob

Honestly, I wasn’t crazy about him ever since he was mean about your college essay.

Parisa

He wasn’t mean. He was right.

Gabriela

Screw that! Everything you write is brilliant.

Parisa

Am I brilliant or dumb as rocks? I’m getting confused.

Gabriela

All I’m trying to say is that this feels messy. Maybe you should stop talking to him for a while? To quote Elena, this kind of stress is not good for your immune system!

Hello?

Parisa??

Are you just going to stop texting back?

The Next Morning

Gabriela

OMG. Parisa. Are you seriously mad at me? Text me back please!

Parisa

I’m a little mad.

Gabriela

Wait. For real?

Parisa

I just felt like you were kind of mean and overreacting to Gideon’s email. He’s not interested in me and we’re not doing anything wrong.

Gabriela

Why is it so hard for you to accept that a guy might be into you?

Parisa

Because no guys ever are!

Gabriela

That’s not true!

Parisa

Name one.

See. You can’t. Let’s be real. Ugly me has been cramping your style for four years. I was the only thing standing in the way of you hanging out with Lizzy and her group. I bet it stung that Andrew was the one that got taken into the fold.

Gabriela

What? I would never hang out with Lizzy or any of her bitchy, superficial friends. Is that really what you think of me?

Parisa

No. It’s just… really hard to listen to you lecture me about things being “messy” with Gideon when you get to go through life looking the way you do.

I get it. You don’t realize how beautiful you are. And you’re so used to the attention you don’t even notice it anymore. But I don’t get attention being friends with you, SO I take it where I can get it.

Gabriela

So you do admit there’s something going on!

Parisa

OMG. No. You’re missing the point.

Gabriela

Okay. I’m sorry. I don’t follow. No offense, but you’re not really making sense.

Parisa

Really? Remember what happened the last time we went to Pinkberry together?