I think if we did have sex, it would be too much physical contact too soon. After months of isolation, I’m not sure our bodies would be able to handle it. This feels like enough for now. This feels better than everything else. No more conversations in the stairwell, I think to myself. Life is too short not to do this every day.

PARISA

My “I don’t want to get out of bed anymore” stint lasted all of two days. Admittedly, not by choice. If it were up to me, my bed-in would have continued till the end of this godforsaken pandemic, but the Naficy family does not let you wallow, even if wallowing is what you need. Iranians are unmatched when it comes to throwing parties: weddings, birthdays, Persian New Year—but we don’t believe in pity parties. Sadness can sometimes feel like the preferred mode in our culture, but we are also required to function through it.

So by day three, Neda dragged my ass out of bed to go for our morning swim. My mom forced me to shower and get dressed and log into my computer for school. And my dad, against my better judgment, persuaded me to go with him for a walk around the block. He said the fresh air and vitamin D would be good for me and did his best not to laugh when I insisted on wearing two masks and a face shield. If I could have left the house in a hazmat suit, I would have, but you can’t find them anywhere on the internet. The therapy sessions with Bonnie don’t seem to be doing much for my anxiety, but to be fair, that’s probably because I spend most of the hour bullshitting her.

Maybe that’s why I’m so excited to finally talk to Gideon tonight. Lately, Gabriela has been harder to pin down, and I suspect that’s because she’s busy passing the time with Wes. It’s nice knowing that I also have another person to talk to and confide in. Gideon and I haven’t seen each other since my accident because I wanted to wait till my face had healed, but I’ve missed communicating with someone who will just let me be sad without judgment. And now that I’m starting to think straight again, and I’ve figured out a way to manipulate my Zoom video filter to make my skin look perfect, I’m excited to catch up with him. I don’t even mind waiting up till he’s done FaceTiming with Neda. It’s not like I’m sleeping much these days anyway.

“You look good,” Gideon says when I turn on my video function.

“Thanks. It was touch-and-go there for a while.”

“I know,” he replies. “Your sister texted me photos. Yikes.”