Kai says something to them, rises, his abdomen contracts, muscle after muscle knotting until his stomach is one of those washboards of definition. He has that other tattoo lower on his belly, sandwiched between shorts and navel, the one that looks like a growling bulldog.

He’s left the table and is walking toward me. My breath catches in my throat, and I don’t know what to do. I pull my sarong tighter, making sure the fabric is wrapped securely around my waist.

“Hey, girl,” Kai says, standing before me. The sun is dropping in the sky and slanting long across the ocean, the reddish gold rays nearly blinding.

I lift a hand to shadow my eyes. “Hi.”

“Looking for me?” he asks, and I blush and sputter and shake my head.

“No.”

He laughs, and it’s warm and husky, just like his smile. The man’s gorgeous and confident, possibly arrogant, but he’s also intriguing. “Just out for a walk,” I say.

“Did you see anything interesting?”

“Just this place. Duke’s.”

“Quite a scene,” he says.

“Makes me feel really old.”

His grin makes his eyes even bluer. “You’re not old.”

“I’m definitely a lot older than you.”

He shrugs. “Why does age matter?”

Suddenly I see what I’ve never seen before, and it’s so clear that it makes me want to scream.

I’ve grown old waiting for life and happiness to find me.

I thought marriage and babies, keeping house and decorating the vacation home, would fulfill me. And maybe it did, for a while.

But the newness wore off, and even though I love my children more than life itself, they’re going to grow up and go. They’re going to become adults and move away. And then what?

What happens to the me that’s more mother than woman? What happens to the female in me?

I don’t have an answer for that, and I turn away, out toward the beach where catamarans are anchored and filling with tourists with tickets for the last sail of the day, the sunset cruise.

“Have you ever been on one of those?” I point to the nearest sleek boat.

“All the time. I used to work on the Outrigger part-time.”

“Are they fast?”

“Can be, if you catch a good wind. You haven’t been out yet?”

I shake my head.

“What have you done here?” Kai asks.

I shake my head again. “Not much of anything.”

“Why not?”

“I’ve been here on my own.”

“So that fat hairy guy back by the pool isn’t your husband?”

I laugh at Kai’s description of Butch. “Not my husband. No. I came on my own.”

“Left your husband home?”