Back Expectation: a Novel
Chapters (66)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Epigraph
  4. London Fields
  5. 2010
  6. Hannah
  7. Cate
  8. Lissa
  9. Cate
  10. Abjections
  11. Hannah
  12. Lissa
  13. Soulmates
  14. Cate
  15. Lissa
  16. Hannah
  17. Resistance
  18. Cate
  19. Lissa
  20. Hannah
  21. True North
  22. Cate
  23. Lissa
  24. Hannah
  25. London
  26. Lissa
  27. Cate
  28. Lissa
  29. Hannah
  30. Bras
  31. Cate
  32. Hannah
  33. Cate
  34. Hannah
  35. Cate
  36. Hannah
  37. Lissa
  38. Hannah
  39. Lissa
  40. Hens
  41. Cate
  42. Hannah
  43. Lissa
  44. Hannah
  45. Cate
  46. Lissa
  47. Hannah
  48. Epithalamium
  49. Lissa
  50. Hannah
  51. Cate
  52. Lissa
  53. Hannah
  54. Lissa
  55. Hannah
  56. Cate
  57. Lissa
  58. Hannah
  59. Lissa
  60. 2012
  61. Hannah
  62. London Fields
  63. Acknowledgments
  64. About the Author
  65. Also by Anna Hope
  66. About the Publisher

“I wasn’t sure I’d come.”

“Do you mind if I smoke?”

Cate shakes her head, and Lissa takes out her pouch and rolls.

“I went past the old house,” says Cate. “On the way here.”

“Oh?”

“It was funny. Looking at it and not going in. Are you still in the basement?”

“Barely. I can’t really afford it. I think I’ll have to move.”

“Then it really is the end of an era.”

“Yes, I suppose it is.” Lissa lights her cigarette, blows the smoke away from them. “How’s Tom?” she says. “And Sam?”

“He’s good. Tom’s walking now.”

“Do you have pictures?”

Cate takes out her phone, bringing up a couple of recent photos as Lissa leans in. “He looks like a sweetheart.”

“He is. Sometimes.”

“How’s Hannah?” asks Lissa softly.

“She’s OK, I think. As far as I know they’re still apart. I’m seeing her later. I guess I’ll know more then.”

Lissa nods, turns to look out into the street. “I won’t bother to defend myself,” she says.

“OK.”

Above their heads, the rumble of a train, the squeal of its brakes. The hiss as it opens its doors.

“It’s funny,” says Lissa, turning back. “I’ve been thinking, lately, about that audition. That film. Do you remember? Before we went to Greece?”

Cate’s stomach tightens. “Yes.”

“And how I couldn’t forgive you for it. I’ve sort of hated you, I think. Ever since. For not telling me about it in time.”

“Lissa—”

“No.” She holds up her hand. “Let me finish. I know you have your own version of events. I just wanted to say that lately, I’ve come to understand that I’m capable of things I didn’t ever imagine. And I wanted to say that, whatever happened, I forgive you. That I wish you well.”

Cate opens her mouth to defend herself, then closes it again. “Thank you,” she says. “That means a lot.”

There is the rattle of the train leaving the station above, bound for Liverpool Street, or for the north, for far reaches of the city.

“Sarah’s ill,” says Lissa. “She has cancer.”

“Oh god,” says Cate. “How far?”

“Stage four.”

Cate puts down her cup. “I’m very sorry to hear that, Liss.”

Lissa’s hands move to her hair and back down again. “Yeah,” she says, “it’s all a bit shitty.”

“Is she having treatments?”

“She refused them.”

Cate waits for Lissa to speak.

“I sort of admire her for it,” Lissa says, “but I’m angry too—I mean I’m fucking furious actually.”

Cate nods.

“And . . .” Lissa looks up. “I know you went through it with your mum, and I wanted to ask you what to expect?”