“Umm, under any other circumstances, it would freak me the hell out. But this, I can’t miss this. Plus, I’d be traveling with an OB nurse.”

“Maybe you’ll deliver on the plane,” Q says. “Wait, if we’re flying over Pennsylvania, then would the baby still be an Ohioan?”

Autumn smiles. “You’re thinking of what happens when you’re born in a different country.”

Q laughs. “Oh yeah.”

“I’m buying the tickets now. If we hurry, we can make the red-eye.”

Whit pulls out her credit card. “How much are the tickets?”

But Ms. B’s face is thirty-nine levels of offended. “Never ask how much a gift costs.”

“I’m not letting you pay for everyone,” Whit argues. “The tickets must cost a small fortune.”

But Ms. B isn’t having it. Tears snagged in her eyelashes, she gets all this is how it’s gonna be. “If I don’t spend my money on this, where will I spend it after? What good is money if you don’t have your loved ones to enjoy it?”

Which makes sense.

Which makes sad.

“We leave in three hours,” Ms. B confirms. “Just enough time to pack and get to the airport.”

And then it’s like we’re a basketball team coming out of a time-out, breaking our huddle and then hurrying to our respective positions on the court.

Ms. B and Q race home to get a few things.

“Nana’s okay with you just picking up for NYC?” I ask Autumn, as I rifle through the dryer for clean socks.

“No. But she’s okay with me spending as much time with Q as I can . . .”

I slip a sock over my hand, pinch my thumb against my index finger and say, “I’m glad you’re here. Thank you.” I open and close my fingers like the sock’s talking.

Autumn pulls a sock over her hand. “He’s lucky to have you.”

I shrug. “I wish he was luckier.”

18

Plane tickets, check, but we still need Later Tonight tickets.

“No way there are any seats left for tomorrow,” I say, tapping the keyboard.

Autumn wags her head. “Paging Downer. Debbie Downer?”

I don’t bother retorting I’m a realist. I don’t bother saying what we both know, what all five of us know.

That it’s likely impossible we’ll get tickets to tomorrow’s taping.

That, spoiler alert, Q is 100 percent not gonna be on Later Tonight.

“The point is we try,” Autumn reminds me.

I scour the Later Tonight website for help.

There’s no mention of how to meet Kendrick or even how to audition for the comedy showcase.

But there is an email address.

For general inquiries contact us here: [email protected].

Okay, a very generic address, but still it was something.

A single bread crumb on a spotless floor.

“You think our inquiry’s general enough?” I ask Autumn.