Karen stammered, alarmed. “I’m— I’m sorry.” Then she meant to say something else, but couldn’t think of what it would be.

On that train, speeding away from that strange other version of Lonnie, an old woman walked up and down the aisle, asking for money. I gave her a twenty, because even if it was a scam, she deserved it all, she deserved to swallow the wealth of this city like a black hole. She took the bill, snatching it away from me with dirty arthritic fingers, and said she’d dreamed about me the night before. She’d dreamed Jesus cut off my head so she could have something to eat.

Acknowledgments

I WOULD LIKE TO THANK MY AGENT, STEPHANIE DELMAN, FOR believing in and fighting for this project, as well as Stefanie Diaz, and everyone at Sanford J. Greenburger. Thank you to my editor, Megan Lynch, for her sharp eye and immense intelligence. Also thanks to Angus Cargill, Libby Marshall, Sara Birmingham, and the whole team at Ecco.

So many fellow writers have had a huge impact on this book. Thank you so much to my workshop group: Karen Havelin, Iris Cohen, Hala Alyan, Yardenne Greenspan, Matthew DiPentima, and Lauren Schenkman. I love you all. Thanks to everyone who read or listened at Sundays at Erv’s. Also, endless thanks to Matt Lally and Joe Ponce, as well as Saxon Baird, who was there every step of the way.

Thanks to Tad Beck and Grant Wahlquist for lending me the use of their house and studio. Thanks to Jeff Peer for the story about a girl.

Thanks to all my writing teachers, but most specifically Emily Barton, for helping me get through Columbia (and beyond), and Lidia Yuknavitch, my first writing teacher, the one who started it all.

Thank you to Michael Assous for so many small and large things. And finally, thanks to the world’s best parents, Gary and Diane Stevens, without whom I’d be lost.

About the Author

MADELINE STEVENS IS A WRITER FROM BORING, OREGON, CURRENTLY based in Los Angeles. She holds an MFA from Columbia University and her work has been published in a variety of literary magazines. She spent seven years working as a nanny in New York City. This is her first novel.

Discover great authors, exclusive offers, and more at hc.com.

About the Publisher

Australia

HarperCollins Publishers Australia Pty. Ltd.

Level 13, 201 Elizabeth Street

Sydney, NSW 2000, Australia

Canada

HarperCollins Publishers Ltd

Bay Adelaide Centre, East Tower

22 Adelaide Street West, 41st Floor

Toronto, Ontario, M5H 4E3

India

HarperCollins India

A 75, Sector 57

Noida

Uttar Pradesh 201 301

New Zealand

HarperCollins Publishers New Zealand

Unit D1, 63 Apollo Drive

Rosedale 0632

Auckland, New Zealand

United Kingdom

HarperCollins Publishers Ltd.

1 London Bridge Street

London SE1 9GF, UK

United States

HarperCollins Publishers Inc.

195 Broadway

New York, NY 10007