I appreciated that restraint, and fucking hell did I appreciate his control. He couldn't want me to accidentally end up with his eternity, with all the guilt and pain that would come with such a thing. But I, too, didn't want to give him counterfeit love. If I did this – if we did this – I wanted it to be because both of us wanted that eternity together.

How long? I thought again. How long had he quietly loved me? How long had he smiled and laughed with me, quiet hope and silent despair warring in his heart?

With a sigh, I flopped backwards onto the bed, staring up at the mural on the ceiling. Faery was beautiful and strange and full of fascinating things, but could it be my home? Did it even matter? I had the feeling that if I could just get over myself, if I could find that one last stupid missing piece, that I wouldn't care where I was, as long as I had Dain by my side.

I wanted this tangle to be done being a tangle, but nothing and nobody in Faery was ever straightforward, much to my eternal frustration.

The thought made me smirk, though. I'd had exactly one thought on my mind when I'd gone and wrapped myself around Dain in front of half the High Court, but nobody would believe that I'd been acting without any plan at all. They'd be tying themselves into knots, trying to figure out what game the human girl was playing. Nothing, babey. Head empty, no thoughts. Just macking on the Beast of Phazikai for funsies.

The doorknob rattled a moment before the door opened, and I looked over to see Kamharida walk in. She jumped when she saw me on the bed, and her eyes darted over to the adjoining door before returning to me. I lifted one hand and wiggled my fingers at her.

"Oh," she said, more calmly than I expected. "I didn't expect you to be here this early."

"'Cause the revel isn't over, or because I'm supposed to be boinking the crown prince?" I asked, putting cheerfulness I didn't feel into my voice.

Kamharida chuckled. "Either, really. The palace is abuzz with your dramatic show of affection for him. Did you truly tongue-kiss him in front of everybody?"

"I sure did," I said with a sigh. "Some people from the Court of Mercy were busily flapping their mouths about how Dain was so horrible even his soulmate couldn't stand to touch him, and I figured I'd put that sort of talk to bed by creating all sorts of new, more interesting conversation."

"You certainly did make new conversation, your highness," she said with a laugh. "I suspect you'll be getting wide-eyed looks for the next few days."