Once again, as so often in Saloth Sar’s life, mystery shrouds a crucial moment and conceals an important decision—with hindsight, the most important of his life. Several interesting questions remain unanswered: Exactly when did he become a Communist? Before or after the festival in East Berlin? Before or after Sihanouk’s coup d‘état? And who was his patron inside the party? Who were his immediate superiors? Could they be called role models? Where did he attend cell meetings? What party duties was he asked to perform?28

Another question has to do with Saloth Sar’s motives for joining the Communist party. His earlier life, as we have seen, revealed few hints of sustained political commitment. His essay in Khmer Nisut shows little evidence of systematic reading in Marxism-Leninism, and unlike many of his colleagues he seems to have had no impact on student circles. There is no way of telling if his decision to become a Communist was sudden or came after much reflection. It is impossible to sort out the relative importance of ambition, ideals, group pressure, or inspiring people. What seems to have attracted Sar to the party was its organizational structure and the opportunities for a dedicated person like himself to rise inside it. For the remainder of his life, although the parties he belonged to changed their names or “disappeared,” Saloth Sar remained a dedicated Communist and an organization man.29

People who knew Sar as a fellow Communist, and who were interviewed in the 1980s after his demonization, have been reluctant to provide biographical details about this period in his life. The only clues we have come from Debré’s book about Cambodian communism, published in November 1976, which contains the quotations already cited about Sar’s persuasive manner and his ambitions. Aside from the outburst quoted by Debré, Saloth Sar kept his aspirations to himself, as he admitted to Nate Thayer: “I never talked about myself,” he recalled. “I was taciturn.”30

His seeming lack of personal ambition—like Stalin and Ho Chi Minh, unlike Lenin and Mao—served his purposes and was consistent with the unruffled persona he always displayed. He wanted his rise inside the movement to be seen as a response to historical imperatives, patriotism, and the wishes of others rather than to a strategic plan or calculated moves on his part.

On December 15, 1952, Saloth Sar returned to Marseilles and once again boarded the Jamaique, this time for the journey home. As he crossed the Mediterranean, the Red Sea, and the Indian Ocean, how did he perceive his forty months in France? Academically he had earned no qualifications. This did not upset him. Judging from his conduct when he reached Cambodia, he had decided that instead of pursuing a career or raising a family, he would allow politics to take command of his life. As a Communist, this meant accepting party discipline and preparing himself and his colleagues for an eventual seizure of power. More specifically, it meant taking part in armed struggle against the French. These activities would occur in secret. The odds against success were high; so were the risks he seemed prepared to take. The rewards, if they came, would be enormous, both for him and for his country. After almost twenty years of lackluster studies, Saloth Sar must have been pleased to change direction.