It’s only a little lie – one designed to make sure we both get away safely. It’s for the right reasons.

To my relief, he nods, defeated, and for the first time since he and his brother came back into my life, I see the resemblance between them again. It’s in the slumping of Niall’s shoulders, as if he is carrying the weight of the world on them. The same weight Declan has always looked as if he were carrying.

We walk in silence, the air thick with everything that has been said and that still needs to be said. I’m afraid to speak, to do anything that might drag Niall from his silent reverie and back into the moment.

When my phone rings I jump, fumbling in my pocket to try to silence it, but my hands are too useless in my gloves. They won’t swipe across the screen. Niall stops, turns and looks at me.

‘You can answer it, you know,’ he says.

‘It’s okay. I don’t need to,’ I say. My teeth are starting to chatter with the cold now. ‘It won’t be important. I can call whoever it is later.’

The ringing stops and inwardly I sigh with relief, as we continue on our walk to the cars. However, the relief is short-lived when my phone starts to ring again. Again, I fumble to try to turn it off.

‘Just bloody answer it,’ Niall shouts, stopping and staring at me.

He is agitated, his eyes wild.

I take it from my pocket and see that it is Declan’s number on the screen. How much of all this has he known? Has guilt been the source of his self-destruction? My hands shaking, I pull off one glove. Swiping my finger across the screen, I hold it to my ear and I’m aware that Niall’s eyes never leave mine. I don’t want him to know who I’m talking to, so I do my best to turn the speaker volume down. I can barely hear the voice on the other end.

‘Ingrid?’

There’s an urgency to Declan’s voice, but the last thing I need is to get caught up in a conversation with him. Not now. Not here.

‘Yes. Actually, I’m a little busy right now. Can I call you back in a bit?’ I’m aware my voice sounds funny, as if I’m speaking the lines from a play.

‘Ingrid, are you with Niall? At the reservoir?’

‘Yes,’ I say faux cheerfully. ‘That’s right.’

‘And he’s okay? Everything okay?’

‘Well, you know. Things could be better,’ I say, my voice light still, even though Niall is starting to look agitated again. He’s obviously keen to get moving.

‘Okay,’ he says. ‘Can you get back to the car? I’ll meet you there. Try to keep calm.’